Chapter 43: Confusing Feelings
In his office, Logan reviewed the reports from the most recent Moonshine attack. Everyone had
submitted the necessary reports. He moved on to the medical records of the Moonshine prisoners.
Everything there was in order too. Each of those records was signed by Serena. It still infuriated him
that she had gone against his will to heal their enemy. At the same time, he was overcome with a
sense of admiration for her. She was willing to help others, no matter who they were or what they’d
done. There was a certain beauty in it.
Shaking his head, he went on to review her most up to date renovation records. She was meticulous. If
Logan could have had every wolf in the pack, even Adriana, be as precise and detailed in their reports,
he’d never have to track anyone down for follow up. Whenever he was filing reports, he found the
majority of the time was spent chasing down people that hadn’t done it right! Even Adriana’s updates
about the hospital renovations weren’t as thorough, and she didn’t give him daily updates. He amused
himself, thinking that he could have Serena teach the whole pack a lesson in proper report making and
filing. Sighing, Logan leaned back in his desk chair, tilting it back until it groaned against its springs. He
looked up at his office ceiling, resting his eyes for a moment from going over mind-numbing reports.
When he’d checked in at home earlier, no one had been there. His mother was out, Holly was gone,
and Serena and the twins were somewhere else. It surprised him that the three of them had gone out.
He knew they’d been picked up from daycare, because of the time, but it seemed late for her to go
somewhere with the kids.
After his momentary break, Logan went back to his reports. He pulled a map out of his pack
territory, marking the locations of recent Moonshine attacks. He wanted to know if there was any kind of
pattern or logic to their attacks. If there was, he might be able to predict the location of the next attack.
He made dots on the map for where the attacks had happened, adding in notes of nearby targets of
interest, like the shed that the Moonshine wolves had tried to steal from. Each point they’d attacked did
have a nearby building or area that could be pilfered and stolen from, even if that was a trade convoy
traveling in or out of the territory
So, they were stealing resources. That was their focus. Most of the places they’d hit were points closes
to the border between Moonshine and Night Sky territory. There were a few other targets along the
same lines that hadn’t been hit yet. Logan wanted to set up heavier patrols in those areas. They never
hit the same area more than once, probably assuming that the guards would be increased in an area
that had already been attacked to avoid another.
To thwart them, Logan had to outthink them, get ahead of them. If there was an
attack, bulking up those areas would limit injuries and counter surprise attacks. Carson, he reached out
with the pack mind link. What is it? Carson responded. His response was slow.
I need your help assigning heavier patrols to areas where I think Moonshine might launch their next
attacks, he explained.
Can we meet tomorrow, I’m busy, Carson said. Logan was surprised by that response. Pack security
was a top priority. Logan knew that a night attack from Moonshine, especially after so many wolves had
been imprisoned, would be unlikely. There was no logical reason that they couldn’t wait until the
morning, but Logan wanted to know what was so important to his Beta that he didn’t feel the same
urgency. Busy with what? Logan pressed. He expected his Beta to give him a direct response, shifting
his tone to that of the Alpha, not a friend. I’m having dinner with Serena and the kids, Carson
responded. Logan didn’t say anything back. He was too stunned by Carson’s response. He’d had no
idea that his Beta was interested in Serena.
Okay, tomorrow, he said back, his mental voice sounding stiff, even to him. He cut off the link.
Shaking his head, Logan tried to concentrate on his work again, but he couldn’t! He was uncomfortably
bothered by the fact that his Beta was having dinner with Serena,
and with the kids! It wasn’t like they were off limits to anyone in the pack, he just hadn’t seen it coming.
There was an odd sense of betrayal mixed in with disbelief! He kept trying to justify it to himself, telling
himself that his only interest in Serena was the kids. He’d grown so fond of them and loved getting to
act silly and goofy around them. He tried to tell himself that the betrayal he felt was in regards to the
kids spending time with someone outside his family. He’d begun to see them like family, in a sense.
The way they lived in his house and how involved his mother was with them. All those justifications
were enough to settle his mind and the confusing thoughts that coursed through him. Still, he couldn’t
concentrate on his work anymore, so he left his office and headed home. His mother was still up,
waiting for him, or for someone, to come home. “Oh, other people so live here,” she said with a chuckle
when Logan entered. “Everyone else is still out?” Logan asked, kicking his shoes off by the door. “I
forgot how quiet this house can be without the kids and when it is just me,” Flo said. Logan gave a
strained smile and nodded.
“It is a big, empty house,” he said with a nod. Flo touched her son’s shoulder. “That is easily fixed,” she
said. “You could have your own little pups running around too.”
“Mom,” Logan said, pushing her arm away. “There’s plenty of time for that.” “Until there isn’t,” she
reminded him. Logan shook his head. “Where is everyone?” “Serena is on a date with Carson. I guess
she brought the kids,” he told his mother. She arched an eyebrow. “Good for her,” she said. Logan
swallowed the growl that rose in his throat. “As a single mom, I’m sure she doesn’t get a lot of chances
to socialize unless her friends are willing to let her bring the kids.” Logan said. “Yea, I guess that is
good,” he said. He walked past his mother and to the kitchen. He got himself a glass of water, but his
mother had followed him. “Where is Holly?” she asked. Logan paused in his drinking. He felt guilty
suddenly, knowing where another woman and her kids were, but not knowing where his own girlfriend
was! “Working, I assume,” he said. Flo put her hands on her hips. “Logan, if you don’t feel for Holly the
same she feels about you, you shouldn’t string her along,” his mother warned. “I’m not,” he assured.
“Nothing between us has changed. The way I feel about her hasn’t changed.” It wasn’t a lie. He’d been
colder towards her based on her behavior, but she hadn’t done anything to humiliate anyone else, and
she’d been nicer to the kids. He’d felt his old feelings and attractions rekindled when he saw her
actually trying to be okay with a complicated situation. He still wasn’t ready to declare her his mate, but
he knew he would have to, and soon. “I’m exhausted;” Logan said, leaving his mother in the kitchen.
He really didn’t want to talk to her more. Already, his mind was confused with thoughts and feelings
about Holly and Serena, and now Carson too. It was so unusual to feel confused, betrayed, guilty, and
humiliated all at the same time. If he’d tried to explain what he was feeling, Logan knew that none of it
would make sense. It was easier for him to focus the feelings on the kids. He was fond of them and he
wanted to keep being influential in their lives. He had to remind himself that just because Carson was
now in their lives didn’t mean he couldn’t be. They were still living with him, after all. Logan changed for
bed. He knew he should have texted Holly to ask where she was. He should have been more
concerned about her being out, maybe even feeling jealous of the fact that she hadn’t told him where
she was. The concerns he should have had about Holly just weren’t there! Sighing, Logan laid down
and stared up at the ceiling of his bedroom. He stayed awake until he heard Holly come back. She
came to join him, but he pretended to be asleep. She curled up to him. Logan heard his mother go to
bed, but he still stayed up until Serena and the kids got home, telling himself that it was to make sure
they’d got
back safely, even though he didn’t fully believe it.
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