Xia Meilin didn't know how long she cried but when she was able to calm herself down, she felt her eyes so salty and heavy.
She stood up and her eyes fell on the family picture on his desk. It was the recent family picture they took, together with their twins.
She was smiling happily on the picture and Lu Yifeng had a gentle look on his face.
That gentle look... if he really was the man in her past then... she can never imagine him having a gentle expression on his face.
She took the picture frame and stared at it for a while, the longer she stared at it, the more pain she felt.
She placed the frame back before she went out of the study. She was just walking while her mind was thinking of the things that Lu Yifeng did to her.
Her feet brought her to the room that she shared with Lu Yifeng. She stood in front of it for a while before she slowly opened the door and took a peek inside.
The lights were off and there was no one inside. When she saw this scene in front of her, she felt her heart jump out of her chest. She was supposed to be relieved that he was not in the room but why does she feel the opposite?
She clenched the doorknob tight as she continued staring at the room. She should be happy but... why was she feeling so down right now?
She closed the door and lowered her head.
"I'm sorry..." These were the words he said to her earlier.
He was apologizing for his mistakes but those words weren't enough for her to forgive him. After all the things he has done to her in the past, does he think that a simple sorry can solve it?
Although it wasn't just a simple sorry... He has done so many good things for her... He even protected her by taking a knife for her. Lu Yifeng was really genuine and he showed that he was regretting everything he has done in the past.
He treated her with gentleness and kindness... He even tried his best to control his temper and now that she thinks of it, there was only one time where he almost loses control of it... it was the time where she told him that she wanted to see Feng Ning.
He loses his temper but he was also able to stop himself from hurting her just in time... A prideful man like him apologized to her even though it was her who made him angry.
All throughout the year, Lu Yifeng never forced himself to her... He was so understanding to her.
Change... he really did change...
It was as if there was a fire that ignites inside of her when she realized the things he has done for her, the love he has shown her.
He was not the man she once knew... Even if he was the one who hurt her in her past life... he was different right now. Yes, he was different.
Before she realized it, she was already looking for him in panic but she couldn't find him anywhere. She even went to the garage just to see if the cars were still there.
She was the only person walking around the place in the middle of the quiet night.
Xia Meilin wanted to see him, she wanted to know the reason on why he was willing to go this far for her. She wanted to know why it has to be her.
She has been through a lot and she was tired of fearing him... she just wants to know the truth... she wanted to know everything! She wanted to hear the rest of the things that he has to say to her. Surely what he said earlier wasn't enough.
Now that she thinks of it, the look on Lu Yifeng eyes... there was sadness and... fear in it. What was he afraid of?
She tried to call his phone but no one was answering. The cars were complete and she didn't see him by the seaside, where could have he gone?
She went back to the mansion and suddenly thought that... he could be using another room.
Yes, he was like that. Back then, when she regained the memories of her past life, Lu Yifeng willingly allowed her to use another room. He never forced himself to her and remembering this brought warmth in her chest.
He really was trying his best, wasn't he?
Xia Meilin decided to check all the guest's room. When she was on her third room, there he was, lying down on the bed with his back facing her.
"Lu Yifeng?"
Her soft voice resounded throughout the room.
Lu Yifeng's shoulders became stiff when he heard her voice. He wasn't sleeping, how could he sleep when he was blaming himself for not being good enough for her?
Xia Meilin closed the door behind her before she slowly took a step towards him. The closer she got, she noticed that Lu Yifeng was covering his face with his hands.
Something caught her eyes when she stood beside the bed... it was his tears.
Her heart trembled when she saw it... was he crying? Why was he crying?
He was afraid. After all the things he has done for her; to redeem himself in her sight, he was afraid that no matter how hard he tries, he will never be forgiven by her. He was so afraid of losing her that just by thinking of it, it brought great pain in him. There was only one woman in his heart and he was willing to do anything for her just to make her happy.
He learned that one has to sacrifice something just to be with the one they love... for him, he sacrificed his own ego, his temper, his pride as a powerful man for her. He was willing to humble himself for her, only for her. She was the only exception.
Lu Yifeng didn't have the courage to face her, he didn't have enough strength to hear whatever she has to say because... he was afraid that those words would bring the end of him.
The only fear he has was when it came to her. Everything about her was his source of strength and at the same time, she was his weakness.
He was brought back to reality when he suddenly felt a soft and warm body pressing against his back. Xia Meilin's arms were wrapped around him and she was hugging him close from behind.
She closed her eyes as she embraced him. She was indeed a softie. Xia Meilin couldn't tolerate seeing Lu Yifeng like this even if he was the one who brought pain to her... but that wasn't important anymore because he was also the man who brought great happiness to her.
She was not the only one who's been through a lot. She needs to understand that Lu Yifeng has been through so many things as well.
It wasn't easy for him to change, he did many good things for her to prove to her that he was repenting and because of this, Xia Meilin couldn't turn a blind eye to it. She cannot ignore the things he did for her, the love he has showered her.
Xia Meilin didn't know what to say but she knew that her presence was enough to bring ease in his chaos mind.