Chapter 1040: Afraid (1)
Translator: Paperplane Editor: Caron_
Cheng Weiwan knew Han Zhifan’s words were all lies.
But his words still rattled her heart.
In the past, he used to speak to her like this, but in the end, it was all a lie.
She had been lied to once. She couldn’t be foolishly lied to a second time.
So, no matter whether he was telling the truth or not, she couldn’t be influenced by what he said.
She needed to free herself…
With that thought, Cheng Weiwan didn’t wait for Han Zhifan to finish saying “You” and said, “…Did you know? After you left, it wasn’t like I didn’t meet other people, and it wasn’t like other people didn’t express any feelings towards me – I just didn’t respond to them. I rejected them all…”
“It wasn’t like no one tried to persuade me; it wasn’t like no one told me to find someone for Hanhan’s sake; it wasn’t like nobody told me I deserved better! But I still insisted on rejecting them.”
“…Do you know why?”
Han Zhifan didn’t say anything but Cheng Weiwan knew he was listening to her words. After a short moment of silence, she said, “…I admit I truly loved you when we were together. After we broke up, I still really liked you, but I rejected other people not because I liked you, but because I didn’t dare fall for another person ever again.”
“I knew deep down that no matter if it was Lin Muqing or Lin Yinan, they all thought I still had hope for you and didn’t want to give up. I told them that wasn’t it, but they didn’t believe me. Not too long ago, Yinan Ge talked to me about it and asked if I still had any hopes of being with you.”
“Do you know what I said to Yinan Ge?”
“I said you need two things to forget someone: time and a new love.”
“Some people might use a new love to forget, but I chose to only use time.”
“I’m not persistent in waiting for you to love me. I’m just waiting for myself to stop loving you.”
“I didn’t lie to Yinan Ge – everything I said was the truth. Since you brought a woman back home and since I watched you both having sex, standing outside…”
Han Zhifan, who had been listening to Cheng Weiwan all along, suddenly interrupted at that point. “Wanwan, she and I didn’t do anything that day. I was just putting on a show for you to watch…”
“None of that is important… What’s important is that from that night onwards, from the next morning when I sent keys to your apartment when I got home, and from when I put pen to paper and wrote that line ‘I heard you’re with someone new. From here on out, I’m the hero who will fight the battles and bleed everywhere…’ I started waiting for myself to stop loving you.”
“I waited a really, really long time. I’ve waited till now…”
“I don’t know if I’m living well or not, but in comparison to when you first abandoned me, I’m a lot better. So if what you’re saying is true, I’ll tell you the truth too. I don’t want to relive that train wreck of a relationship. I won’t be with you, but it’s not just you, it’s everyone… I won’t be with anyone…”
“To you, maybe you think you really need a chance. Just one.”
“But to me, it’s not that I don’t want to give you a chance, I just can’t give you one…”