Luo Wei stared at the palace hall before him at a loss. This was the Hall of Eternal Light, that much was true, but how did he become just a spirit in its halls? Perhaps he’d been killed by Ku Liu? But he remembered Wei Lan rescuing himself, or was that just an illusion before death?
He walked through room after room in the palace, only a spirit, floating in the air and passing through rooms. No one could see him, and naturally he was unable to let anyone know of his existence.
In what used to be the bedroom of Emperor Xing Wu, Ning Fei was crouched, kneeling beside the imperial bedside. And lying within the bed was Long Xuan.
Luo Wei felt himself blanched with shock. He’d done the best he could, but was the result still going to be the same? Long Xuan would become emperor, and his family still dead beyond his help? Luo Wei positioned himself above Long Xuan, and it was only then that he saw that Long Xuan looked deathly, as if he could die from the very next breath.
“Your Imperial Majesty,” Ning Fei’s voice was broken with the wetness of tears, “Please, you should take your medicine!”
“Zi Zhou,” Long Xuan’s voice sounded breathy and weak, his lungs were no longer able to support his voice.
“Your Imperial Majesty!”
“The Crowned Prince is young still, after this, I will be counting, counting on you.”
“Your Imperial Majesty,” Ning Fei held up some of the medicinal tonic on the short table next to him, “Please, just a mouthful, your humble servant begs of you!”
But Long Xuan only shook his head, “It’s useless, why should I keep drinking it?”
Ning Fei’s hand shook. The tonic was still steaming when some of it dipped onto Ning Fei’s hand, but he didn’t seem to notice at all.
Long Xuan wasn’t looking at him either, as if he was mumbling to himself, “Do you know why I did those things to him? When everyone in the world was trying to get Long Yu’s favor, he was the only one who was good to me wholeheartedly. But he had no talent or morals, he didn’t compare with an inch of your finger, Zi Zhou, but I… How could I fall for someone like this? I thought that maybe if I destroyed him completely, maybe all of this would end.”
Luo Wei stared at this, dumbstruck.
Long Xuan looked at Ning Fei, “But I still couldn’t forget him! Even if he was the lowest, dirtiest, cheapest person in this world, I still think of him. Do you know why I dug out his eye? Because I couldn’t see the past in it. Aside from hatred in his eyes, all I could see was more hatred, nothing else. I cursed him for betraying his family, but everything he did was for me, he betrayed his family for me, and I betrayed everything he did. We’re the same, he and I, we’re both guilty.”
Ning Fei couldn’t stand to listen to this any longer, and spoke, “Your Imperial Majesty, let’s not mention the past anymore.”
“Not mention it anymore?” Long Xuan laughed, “How could I not? I love him! I’m a madman, a madman!” Long Xuan’s tears fell on the pillow, “A madman!”
Luo Wei left. He wished that he’d never come here.
The streets were peaceful and quiet, the snow fell in the silence. Luo Wei had never had the memory of a night as lonely and silent as this. He stood under the roof sills of a commoner’s house, watching the occasional person walk by, leaving a trail of footsteps behind them in the snow. Not much longer after, the snow had filled those footsteps anew.
When the sun had set, mourning bells rang out from the palace.
Long Xuan had died.
The entire nation wept.
Luo Wei stood under the roof sills, not thinking of anything, just standing. He watched as every house and home put up the white flags of mourning. He watched the monks from the Hu Guo temple rush by him. They are rushing to the palace to read scripture for the emperor who had just passed. The streets that were so lively a day ago, in the period of one night, became silent and withdrawn with the news of Long Xuan’s death.
In seven days, the new emperor saw his father off to the imperial tombs.
Luo Wei saw Xie Yu, he saw Liu Shuang Shi, he saw Zheng Jing Feng, and he saw Emperor Ping Zhang’s various ministers and generals.
Ning Fei was standing at the new emperor’s side. It was only seven days, but Ning Fei had aged, the hair around his ears had gone white.
Luo Wei looked at the grand coffin. Long Xuan had only outlasted him by only a year. Long Xuan wasn’t wrong. Luo Wei was a cheap whore, and Long Xuan was just a madman. How sad for Ning Fei, that he fell in love with such a madman, who would tell him before his death that he was in love with some whore, and not Ning Fei instead, even if they’d consummated their relationship within the imperial bed.
The wind and snow became ever stronger. It reminded Luo Wei of the storm when he had died. Was this a coincidence, or was it something determined in the mysterious passages of fate? Luo Wei wanted to cry, but he had no tears left as a spirit.
A mourning flag was ripped from its post by the wind, coiling and curling at Luo Wei’s feet.
Ning Fei’s eyes followed this mourning flag with his eyes until it fell under the roof sill. The street was full of commoners and citizens kneeling in mourning, but there seemed to be someone standing where the flag fell. Ning Fei stumbled, almost falling as he tripped over a step in surprise. Why was Luo Wei here?
“General,” One of his followers quickly rushed ahead to steady him.
Ning Fei lifted his gaze again to where the flag fell again, but there was only that piece of cloth, laying in the snow, motionless. There was no Luo Wei. There wasn’t anyone there. Ning Fei looked at the coffin in front of him, his eyes full of a tragic loneliness.
“I’m going to find Luo Wei,” Long Xuan’s last words reverberated, “But I’m scared, I’m afraid that he doesn’t want to see me ever again.”
Ning Fei had never known what Long Xuan was thinking. The pleasures of the flesh they’d experienced had only brought on larger bouts of emptiness for him. Ning Fei had never understood Luo Wei either. Why had he been so in love with Long Xuan? Why had he fallen for someone who had never been good to him, and sacrificed everything for that man? Maybe this is something best left between Long Xuan and Luo Wei, and he, Ning Fei, was just an outside, a complete third party to the goings on between them.
“General?” The new emperor had stopped too.
“Your Imperial Majesty, I’ve embarrassed myself.” Ning Fei quickly said as he lowered his head.
“Let’s go,” The new emperor also looked towards the sill of that common dwelling. It was only a commoner’s home, empty of residents at the time being, with that flag coiled on the ground all by itself.
Ning Fei knew that he’d mistaken nothing for something. Why would Luo Wei be here? To see Long Xuan off? Ning Fei’s eyes flickered towards that flag one last time, watching as it was carried off by the wind. Luo Wei wouldn’t be here. How would he have ever forgiven Long Xuan after being abandoned and betrayed in such a way?
“How many are those lost in the affairs of love and obsession,” The Grandmaster mumbled to himself at the rear of the procession, “Not knowing that such thought leads to hurt, that longing feelings lead to a shortened life!”
“Grandmaster?” Those younger priests in the procession didn’t understand. The emperor had just passed, why would a monk such as the grandmaster, with his third eye opened, speak such words at a time like this?
“Those that have died, have died, why not go back?” The Grandmaster’s eyes were full of pity, staring up at the sky as he sighed.
Why not go back? Luo Wei cast his eyes over the empty skies and land. Where was the way back for him?
The sounds of scripture began. Those who were devout could hear that what was being recited was the Chant of a Past Life. An emperor of a dynasty had just died, his soul was being returned to the imperial tombs at Xia Chuan. Why would they be reciting a Chant of a Past Life?
Long Xuan’s coffin and funeral procession slowly passed into the distance, until they were no longer within eyeshot.
The citizens who knelt at the sides of the streets slowly disappeared back into their homes as well.
The streets were quiet and empty again.
The snow that had just now been stamped with footsteps in disarray had, in a moment, become covered yet again.
TRANSLATOR’S NOTES:
Hello!! Sorry for the delay and the lack of updates. I have been too busy at work again, this time at the new job. I hope you were not disappointed by this chapter, but this is where my heart was tugged for Long Xuan when I read this novel the first time. My heart ached for him, but I still hate him xD I hope you guys can hold your hate for long enough to read through the rest of this.
Thank you again for reading this, I’m sorry I’ve been so spotty with posting lately… life isn’t going very good for me recently, but I want to pick up the pace again so we can get to the bottom of this romance!!!!