I was in bed ugly crying watching greys anatomy. I had a bag of sweets and a big bag of chips. My
laptop was open and my phone was near by. My gran had messaged saying she wouldn't be late and
that she was bringing home a Chinese.
I had my Facebook open looking back at old pictures. That didn't help with the mood I was it. Just
made me cry even more.
I didn't know I would miss my old life as much as I did. My phone pinged but I chose to ignore it. I
wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone.
Could be my gran though. Picking up my phone I saw Alanna's name.
'Are you okay? Ax'
'I'm fine :)'
I sent the smiling face hoping she would believe me. I wasn't in the mood to talk about my feelings. I
was okay I was just sad and being sad was okay.
'Want to come over?Ax'
"Can't studying. I'll see you tomorrow if you're in. Night x'
It wasn't a lie. I couldn't write my personal statement but I could type it with one hand. It may take me
forever but I had to at least show I was doing some work.
My phoned pinged again. This girl didn't give up.
'I'm sorry you're having a rough time just now. I'll keep my distance until I need too. Won't be forever
princess'
My mouth became dry.
He was finally listening to me.
'Thank you x'
I deleted his number after that.
I could hear the music, I could hear the laughter. He was having a party of some sort and I could no
longer concentrate.
My front door slammed shut.
"Leah come down I've got dinner". My gran yelled.
Great I was starving and for once she wasn't home too late.
"Wow they've done a great job Leah. Isn't it beautiful?". She gushed. It was always nice to see my gran
smile. "Said they would be done by Thursday. Grab some paper plates honey".
I stood with my arms crossed leaning against the bunker. I just wasn't fitting in here at all. I know it had
only been two days but it didn't seem to be getting any better.
I burst out crying.
"Oh Leah, sweetheart what's wrong". I was pulled into my grans arms as she held me tight. "Who's hurt
you? What's happened?".
"I'm just sad". I cried. "None of the girls at school like me, none of them want to get to know me. So
much for making new friends".
"Oh honey". She whispered. "I'm so sorry I moved us away. I uprooted your life and expected you to be
okay with it. We shouldn't have moved".
"I'm just not fitting in". I sobbed wiping at my eyes.
"What about Alanna? Is she not your friend?".
"Yes. It's okay I'm okay". As I started to plate my dinner my gran placed her hand on my arm. "It's hard
sweetheart but you'll get there, we'll get there together".
"I know. I'm going to eat mine upstairs and then go to bed. I'm not feeling good and my hands sore". I
was laying the ground work so I could take a sick day tomorrow.
"That's okay sweetheart. Go eat your dinner and get some rest".
I headed back to my room and continued to watch greys. I don't know where the tears had come from. I
was always the strong independent girl but recently I felt like a broken one.
Why didn't I have someone to fix my crown?
Checking my phone I noticed I had a message from Ryan. He seemed to be my only real friend at the
moment.
'You alright shorty?'
'I'm okay! Thanks for checking in. I won't be in school tomorrow. I'm not feeling great but I'll see you
Thursday'
After finishing my dinner I placed my plate on my beside drawer. I could still hear the music and it was
probably going to be like that for the majority of the night.
There was always something going on in his house.
..
I couldn't sleep.
The music was starting to get on my nerves.
Throwing my covers off I grabbed a jumper and pulled it over my head. Instantly regretting it when all I
could smell was him.
Getting out of bed I quietly made my way downstairs trying not to wake my gran. I had the fridge open
staring for something that wasn't there. I didn't even know what I was looking for.
Boiling the kettle I took the hot chocolate from the cupboard and emptied some into a cup. It was far to
late for coffee so this would have to do. Adding some milk and a few marshmallows I took a seat at the
island.
My phone pinged.
'Are you awake?Ax'
'Yes. What's up?'
'Can I come over?Ax'
It was late. I had noticed the music had been turned down though.
'It's late Alanna'
'I'll only be 5mins I promise.Ax'
'Back door'
"Why are you sitting in the dark?". She asked her voice low. I wasn't sitting in the dark, the lights
around the island were on along with the ones under the counters.
"What's up?". I asked.
"Jake said you and a rough day today".
"Did he? Jake needs to mind his own business".
"Leah". She sighed. "What's going on?". Taking a seat next to me she grabbed my hand. "You know I'm
here right?".
"Nothing I'm fine". Scraping my chair back I got to my feet. "Was there anything else?". Emptying what I
had left in my cup I placed it in the sink.
"Wow I didn't take you for a girl that cared about what other people think". She huffed.
I bit my lip. She was right I didn't but this somehow hit different.
"Do you know I had a girl come up to me today, snap her fucking fingers in my face and told me I better
stay awake from Jake". I snapped. "Do you know how small she made me feel?".
"What, who?”.
"Every girl in this little bloody town hates me because they think something is going on with him and I. I
can handle my own but I've done nothing wrong to be treated the way I'm being treated".
"Does Jake know what happened?". She questioned already her phone was in her hand.
"He doesn't need to know". I sighed. "Look it's late I need to get to bed".
"He likes you Leah and I think maybe you like him too. My brother has a good heart, and he'd treat you
like his queen but you're too scared about what other people might say and that's causing you to miss
out".
I did like him.
Why was I being so stupid?
"Don't ruin what might be a good thing because of stupid little bitches. Who cares what they think and
besides they don't have a chance with him. None of them do".
"Did he send you over here?".
"He didn't I came because he's sad. I've never seen him like this before. He's always the life of the
party, cocky and arrogant prick but not tonight".
I didn't like that he was sad and I had no idea why.
"But lucky for me he'll be an asshole tomorrow when we're training". She sighed her voice dripping with
sarcasm. "Give him a chance Leah. You won't regret it. Good night".
And then she left.
I was in bed but I still couldn't sleep. I had wrote out a message for Jake but was hesitant to send it. It
wasn't much, in fact it was only a few words. With my finger hovering over the button I finally sent it.
'Meet me tomorrow at noon. Coffee shop'
I didn't know if what I had done was going to be a mistake but there was only one way I was going to
find out.
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