Chapter 1565: Untitled
In late spring, there were already cicadas in the courtyard outside the window. Their sporadic chirping, more irritable than usual, seemed as if they too were undecided about fully committing to their task since summer had not yet arrived. They had come early this year; when approaching the window, the dark chill outside felt like icy water, giving Qiao Yuansi's exposed skin a fine layer of goosebumps.
After placing the bird feeder on the windowsill, she closed the window and picked up two mugs from the dining table. Her eyes glanced at an open notebook nearby. The hot tea in the cups was filled to the brim, and as she took small steps, the steam wafted like a mist, clouding the air before her eyes.
Seeing this, Shoreis leaped up from the sofa and took the two tea cups from her.
"Why did you make it so hot?" he asked, looking at Qiao Yuansi from beneath his messy hair, pretending to bring a cup to her lips. "Here, take a sip first, then I'll take it."
"Stop messing around," Qiao Yuansi said with a laugh, fending him off, but the smile quickly vanished.
The clock was nearing ten. The daytime's heat and clamor were gradually falling like snowflakes, settling into a silent and cool night.
Wearing a tank top and shorts, Qiao Yuansi sat cross-legged on the carpet, holding her cup and complaining about the heat. Her fingers were cold without the touch of the cup; Shoreis sat on the sofa opposite her, watching her busy fingers for a moment before he couldn't help but chuckle.
Once that laugh had dissipated, the two fell silent again.
Their last encounter had been too brief, and the time apart too long. Seeing each other again was like light meeting ice; there was no connection or harmony. Qiao Yuansi kept her head down, and after a few seconds, suddenly asked, "Why did you come back?"
Shoreis rubbed his messy hair, leaned back on the sofa, and exhaled a long breath. "I... I just happened to be passing by, and I thought of you. I wanted to see if you were okay."
Qiao Yuansi silently nodded, and the room fell quiet again. She could feel Shoreis' gaze sweeping over her and his hesitation to speak—as if he hadn't expected her to close herself off like a clamshell, unsure whether to knock on her shell.
"I'm fine," Qiao Yuansi whispered, looking at her fingertips reddened by the hot cup. "Now you've seen."
Shoreis leaned forward, his broad and thin shoulders slightly hunched. "Do you want me to leave?"
Qiao Yuansi was silent for a moment before suddenly lowering her head and wiping her eyes.
"Since you decided to leave, you shouldn't have come back," she said in a choked voice. "You know what I mean... and I know what you meant then."
Shoreis was taken aback, speechless.
"I know you only have a fourteen-month limit in each world. I know," Qiao Yuansi said, her voice growing softer. "I know that even if you don't leave, I'll face this world alone in fourteen months. So getting used to this situation earlier is good for me... but since you decided that, why did you come back?"
"I..." Shoreis gently wiped his face. The dark clouds outside obscured the moonlit sky.
"I got used to it, finally," Qiao Yuansi interrupted, hiding behind her steaming mug. "I finally got used to it."
He probably hadn't encountered this situation before; such a capable posthuman now seemed somewhat at a loss. "I... I just wanted to see you."
Qiao Yuansi still stared at her tea. "I know, I'm fine now. I can manage on my own. Don't worry. I had a close call five months ago, but I can take care of myself now..."
"Five months ago?" Shoreis' attention was immediately piqued. "What happened?"
Talking about that incident inevitably brought back memories of Jin Yan.
Qiao Yuansi closed her eyes, nearly numbly recounting how she and Jin Yan had met; when her narration reached the park that evening, her voice began to grow lower and lower. "Jin Yan had just been infected, and she was still herself. So, when those people surrounded me and it looked like things were about to go bad, she suddenly yelled and charged at them from behind, knocking two of them down... Thanks to her, I had enough time to escape."
Shoreis' lips were tightly pursed, and he nodded. "But she transformed later, right?" He leaned closer, his shadow and breath hovering over the coffee table. "The memory of a Changeling is continuous. Did she—"
"She's dead."
Shoreis' expression froze, looking more like a plaster statue under the moonlight outside the window.
"When I took her home later, I told her I would help her just like you helped me. But she was seriously infected, and I had no confidence at that time. I was actually prepared, if she didn't recover, to leave my job and house here and run away... But the next morning, I found her dead," she said, her tone flat.
"Suicide?" Shoreis guessed immediately.
Qiao Yuansi silently nodded.
The orange glow from the silent desk lamp flowed down, filling the emptiness between the two. Shoreis had lost a lot of weight, his T-shirt hanging loosely on him; he bowed his head, suddenly stood up, walked around the coffee table, and sat down beside Qiao Yuansi, stirring the wind and ruffling his hair and shirt.
"I'm sorry."
He reached out, but as he was about to touch Qiao Yuansi, she suddenly turned and threw herself into his arms. Shoreis froze, his half-extended arm hanging in the air for several seconds before slowly coming back, his fingers hesitating, landing on Qiao Yuansi's warm bare back.
Not a single tear fell from Qiao Yuansi's eyes. She refused to let go, only lifting her head, clinging to his neck like a vine to a tree trunk. Her cheek brushed against his Adam's apple, her collarbone hit his chest, warm and cold skin pressed together, hair and breath tangled in one place.
"Tomorrow," she said, her voice low and sobbing, "leave... and never come back..."
Shoreis made a painful, almost mute sound from his throat.
The dark red Persian carpet was thick and dense, supporting and yielding like waves. Qiao Yuansi swayed uncontrollably like a small boat. The dim desk lamp light wrapped around tiny dust particles, rippling and flowing, casting an old movie-like sadness over everything. Colors elongated and merged, the living room shapes stretching and transforming, eventually turning into endless white light, shining into her mind.
Gasping, Qiao Yuansi sat up and reached for the half-cold tea. She was very thirsty and gulped down half a cup; the cicadas outside called once more, then fell silent. She listened and smiled silently.
Shoreis had indeed lost a lot of weight; his back muscles, spine, and scars were all visible in the dim light. Even bare-chested, he seemed unable to dissipate the heat, and he opened the window by the dining table, leaning out to look. "What, are there bugs now?" he asked.
Did he see the insecticide outside the window? Qiao Yuansi nodded and took another sip of tea.
The notebook was still open on the table; she hadn't put it away, nor felt any need to. The dense writing caught Shoreis' eye, and he bent down to read for a moment.
Qiao Yuansi leaned against the sofa armrest, waiting for him to look up.
"Put the bird feeder on the windowsill," she said, unable to contain herself as Shoreis continued to read the notebook silently. It was something she had written five months ago, and she remembered it well. "Since you decided to leave back then, you shouldn't have come back... It took me so long to get used to it."
Shoreis finally raised his head, slowly, as if under a spell.
His skin was so fair that it seemed untouched by the mundane world. Therefore, when a hint of red appeared in the corners of his eyes, it was like blood dripping into the snow, gradually spreading at an imperceptible speed. Qiao Yuansi couldn't help but laugh; she had to cover her mouth, pressing down her cheeks, muffling the laughter back into her mouth.
"You... you've already," Shoreis looked at her, his voice trembling, even struggling to speak. In the makeup-like reddish color in his eyes, a glimmer of tears began to shine. "Completely transformed?"
The hint of red in his eyes seemed to bloom like blood in snow, as Qiao Yuansi's laughter refused to be contained. Her smile was one of mixed emotions, at once sad and tender, knowing and resigned, filled with the complexity of their shared history and the painful reality of their present situation.