Chapter 149 Joy in reunion and grief at separation in one day
Bai Aoxue listened to Cangsheng carefully, when she looked up, tears ran down from her cheek, and made her clothes wet.
She once thought that she didn’t have tears. Now it seemed that it was not the case. She was just not in a mood of extreme grief.
Although he couldn’t see clearly, Cangsheng still felt that Bai Aoxue was crying, and his heart was palpating greatly.
Did she…shed tears for him?
He had never expected for this, and never dared to expect it.
Cangsheng lifted his hand slowly and with difficulty, which could not stop the idea of touching Bai Aoxue’s cheek.
He wanted…wanted to wipe the tears that dropped for him.
He wanted her face to wear pride and indifference forever, and her eyes be stubborn and obstinate to witness the happiness and sorrow in this world.
Don’t be sad. Don’t be sad for his death.
Don’t cry. Don’t cry for his death.
Because he was not a lucky man, god never showed mercy to him. He shouldn’t have appeared in her life. But he had always considered himself lucky that he once appeared in her life, although it was short, she would never forget him.
Cangsheng asked lightly, “Aoxue, do you remember what you said about my name when we first met each other?”
Bai Aoxue’s eyes were red, her tears ran down from her cheeks and dropped on the ground, splashing dust in the air, which all disappeared.
“I remember. I said still water runs deep, and blow the reed-pipe wind instrument on the sea. Cangsheng is really a good name.” Bai Aoxue looked up and curled her eyes with tears shining in them.
Cangsheng nodded and opened his mouth, “I was really very happy then, because I know that this lady recognized me as equal to her.”
Cangsheng seemed to recall the scene of their first meeting, and his lips curled up to make an arc.
“Do you still remember the last sentence? You just spoke half of the sentence.” Cangsheng looked at Bai Aoxue, and his pupils couldn’t focus.
Bai Aoxue wanted to shake her head because she didn’t want to say the other half of the sentence. But she noticed that Cangsheng’s eyes were full of hope. So, she held back the words to reject him.
Tears pouring out of her eyes, Bai Aoxue took a deep breath. She was concerned about Cangsheng, and she felt that the air in her chest was in shortage.
“Moon waxes and wanes consistently, while human experience joys in reunion and grief at separation now and then…” Words came out of her thin lips, Bai Aoxue saw Cangsheng’s eyes closed gradually, and his hand fell slowly without touching her.
All this was like in slow motion which seemed to last half a century.
Tears blurred Bai Aoxue’s eyes, but she still read his lips and figured out his words.
“It turns out to be true on me!”
Bai Aoxue grabbed Cangsheng’s hand in a hurry, and held it tightly. She lowered her head, and kept silent.
In the hollow dungeon, there was only Eunuch Zhao crying sadly.
Jun Yeyan didn’t say a word from the very beginning, but he clenched his fists tightly and he was concerned about Bai Aoxue when he saw her crying.
For this world, one person’s death makes no difference. But for Bai Aoxue, Cangsheng’s death was a huge attack to her.
The man who was like a breeze blowing over when he smiled, the man who helped Bai Aoxue when she was alone and helpless, left the world behind with disappointment and complete relief.
Cangsheng was just like a breeze, appearing in coincidence, lasting for a short period and disappearing without any concern.
Jun Yeyan opened his mouth with thin lips several times, but he didn’t know what to say.
The sense of helplessness made him feel sad. His Aoxue grieved for Cangsheng, but he didn’t know what to say to comfort her.
“Jun Yeyan, I want to take Cangsheng out of here. He must have been hoping to be buried with Helian Cangyue, right? I haven’t done anything for him, but I owe him much. So this time, let me do something for him.” Bai Aoxue put down Cangsheng’s hand lightly and said.
On hearing Bai Aoxue’s words, Jun Yeyan’s eye became sweet and his mouth with thin lips opened a little, he said with tenderness that was exclusive to Bai Aoxue, “OK, let’s take Cangsheng out of here.”
Bai Aoxue stood up slowly, and when she lifted her head, there were already no tears in her eyes, but brightness and pride. It seemed like she was not the person who cried just now, because there was no sign of weakness on her.
It seemed that everything happened just not was just a delusion. And Bai Aoxue restored her indifference and pride as usual.
No matter how, she knew clearly and always reminded herself that she was Bai Aoxue, who shouldn’t be weak more than three seconds. To be weak was lethal. She couldn’t look weak in front of others.
Bai Aoxue had a glance at the dungeon, and stared at the man who wanted to take advantage of Cangsheng and was taken under control by Zhao.
“Zhao, cut his hands and feet, blind his eyes, and cut his tongue. People like him alive will only make the world dirtier. So I will be a butcher this time, to help the world get rid of garbage.” Bai Aoxue said slowly, staring at the man who had turned pale on hearing her words.
Then, Bai Aoxue threw the knife to Zhao.
Zhao was not very sure about Bai Aoxue’s words, for his eyes blinked several times. But he still took the knife neatly.
Bai Aoxue’s words put the others in silence for a short while.
“Master, it’s time to leave now. It will be very hard to get out of here if the time for shift change is past.” The man in black reminded appropriately.
But Jun Yeyan didn’t say anything. He waited Bai Aoxue to make the final decision.
Bai Aoxue turned and asked Eunuch Zhao, who was holding Cangsheng’s body, “Eunuch Zhao, what are you going to do now?”
Eunuch Zhao smiled in grief, and his body stooped as before, which seemed never get straight.
“Cangsheng died at such a young age. I wanted to save him back then, but turned out to put him into danger. I was involved in the death of 41 lives of Helian family. The reason that I have carried so many sins and guilt to live in this world is that I wanted to protect Cangsheng. Now Cangsheng is dead, and there is no meaning for me to live in this world.” There was a relief in his sad words.
Bai Aoxue was just about to say something when Eunuch Zhao took out a knife from his sleeve and stabbed hardly into his own heart.
And it was too late for Bai Aoxue to stop him.
“Fifth Prince, Fifth Princess, please get out of here quickly, it will not be long before the Emperor comes and it will be very hard to get out of here then.” Eunuch Zhao said with difficulty.
“Why did you do this?” It was Jun Yeyan’s voice who hadn’t spoken all the time instead of Bai Aoxue. Jun Yeyan didn’t expect that Eunuch Zhao, the man that contributed his whole life to the palace, died in this way.
“I should go down to ask for forgiveness of Lord Helian. I will not get peace if I keep living in this world.” Eunuch Zhao opened his eyes widely, and poured out the words in his mind with his last breath.
Even though members of Helian family didn’t blame him, this old man still thought it was his fault. He was only a man appointed to read out the royal decree.
Bai Aoxue witnessed Eunuch Zhao die without any regret, her lips quivered, but she didn’t say anything.
She recalled once she was at the outside of a church on the Wall Street, listening to the people inside the church read the Bible with piety.
Back then, she couldn’t understand why people were born with sins?
She had always been thinking that those people’s lives are too easy and comfortable that they cannot find anything to do except believing god which doesn’t exist after all.
People are born with original sins and will committed sins during one’s life. Both of the two kinds of sins are indelible. She didn’t understand it, nor did she want to. Then she committed sins of all kinds, which were dirty in pure people’s opinion. She despised such belief even more.
Because god didn’t protect her from freezing to death in snowstorm, nor did god provide her with a meal when she was starving. All she needed was so simple, but god never favored her. So she depended on herself. Although what she did was against the will of god.
As long as she was alive, so what?
Now, seeing Eunuch Zhao and Cangsheng, she seemed to figure out something: be it original sins and sins committed during one’s life, what everyone, including the bravest savior, needed was just relief, or an excuse that let them be so disappointed at the world.
But they could get relief and the excuse from no one.
Sins originated from human mind and were put into practice.
“It’s time to go.” Bai Aoxue blinked her eyes and shook away the thoughts in her mind and then looked at Jun Yeyan.
She was already a sinner in god’s opinion since she was born. Let it be, because the people around her were all sinners.
The man in black led the way, followed by Jun Yeyan and Liushuang, and Zhao was at the end of the group. They left the dungeon quickly.
Before Zhao got out of the dungeon, he set fire on this gloomy place at Jun Yeyan’s command.
They got out of the palace in a hurry, while Jun Wuhen was on the way to the dungeon.
He didn’t expect that what waited him was another fire after seven years instead of the result of interrogation. And this time, he seemed to see a lady dancing in despair in the flame.
“Fire! Fire!”
“The dungeon is on fire!”
Jun Wuhen was in a panic. His feelings had been in an unsettled state since the moment Liu Manyun got poisoned.
He had just finished making arrangements of Liu Manyun’s funeral and he pretended that he was morning on Liu Manyun’s death. Jun Wuhen hastened to the dungeon and was ready to interrogate Cangsheng to figure out the person who instigated Cangsheng to poison him.
And out of his expectation, before he could get near to the dungeon, he saw thick smoke floating in the air of the palace. Jun Wuhen’s face was very gloomy.
There was shouting and crying from the palace maids and young eunuchs. Jun Wuhen burst into rage.
He grabbed a eunuch by his side and shouted angrily, “Here is my order to Meng Fei to carry out: enclose the palace, anyone is not allowed to enter and exit the palace from now on. Anyone who is suspicious will be taken into custody and interrogate. I will figure out who dares to set fire on the palace!”
Then he pushed away the eunuch and trotted towards the spot in fire.
“Ah!” There was a scream in the air of the palace. Jun Wuhen looked towards the direction from which the scream came, and it was the imperial study. Jun Wuhen frowned. One chaotic chapter eclipses another.