Chapter 77
Translator’s note: A double release because I’m not that mean. =)
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Qiao Shao pushed down on the queasiness he felt in his stomach and ate the crab.
After taking a bite, he couldn’t hold back his nausea and went to the bathroom to retch.
But there was nothing to vomit. He hadn’t eaten for two days, and his stomach was completely empty.
He wanted to wash his face, but then he saw his face in the mirror.
——He was as thin as piece of driftwood and pale as a sheet. He was like something that had crawled out of a grave.
Qiao Shao bowed his head hastily and turned on the faucet. He splashed water on his face.
The cold water steadied his galloping heart. When he looked to the mirror once again, he looked like his normal self.
He was still thin and pale, but he was no longer just skin and bones and he didn’t have that bloodless paleness of a corpse.
He’s back. He’s already come back!
Qiao Shao’s hands trembled as he wiped his face.
At 10.40 pm, Qiao Zongmin returned home.
When Aunt Wu saw him, she said worriedly, “Sir, Shao Shao didn’t eat anything for dinner.”
Qiao Zongmin froze.
Aunt Wu had been anxious all evening. “When he came back home, he didn’t look quite right.”
Qiao Zongmin took off his coat and said, “I’ll go see him.”
Aunt Wu didn’t say much more. She simply took his coat and hung it for him in the cloakroom.
Qiao Zongmin knew this might happen. Zhang Guanting reminded him that the final exam would be a big hurdle for Qiao Shao.
Especially now that Qiao Shao had made a little improvement; with his increase in self-confidence, if he were to be dealt a blow now, he might regress back to this previous condition.
Although he was mentally prepared, he was still scared to think that his son, who had been getting back to normal, would once again neither sleep nor eat.
“Shao Shao?” Qiao Zongmin knocked at the door, “are you asleep?”
How could Qiao Shao fall asleep? He hid the wooden fortune under his pillow, got up and opened the door. “I was just about to.” He pretended to yawn.
Qiao Zongmin considered it and dared not ask him about dinner. “Are you going to take a vacation?” He didn’t even dare mention the exam.
Qiao Shao said, “After we get the results, then we’ll have a summer vacation.”
Qiao Zongmin asked. “So… Will you return to school?”
Qiao Shao paused and said, “Four days later.” That’s when the results would come out as well.
Qiao Zongmin pondered for a long time, and thought of a topic that would make Qiao Shao happy. “Did you arrange to meet with your friends to play?”
Qiao Shao was stabbed clear through his sore spot by his old man.
He hurriedly blurted out a reason. “I have to participate in the Math Society’s competition, so I’ll be reviewing here for the next few days.”
Qiao Zongmin heard him and immediately responded, “Okay! Then dad won’t bother you.”
Qiao Shao nodded and bid him good night.
After closing the door, Qiao Shao slid down to the floor and sat there&#k2026;
Before the exam, He Shen said, &#k2018;When it’s time for the league competition, come to my house to answer the questions.’
Qiao Shao agreed.
But now &#k2026;
He buried his head in his knees and sat there for the entire night.
He thought he was getting better, that he wasn’t “a mental case” anymore; that he could live like a normal person.
But truth was, he was no good.
As soon as he entered the exam room, he was exposed for what he was — an embarrassment who could only score last place. However, what was most difficult for him to accept was that he hadn’t changed.
Qiao Shao really thought he had changed.
He remembered his mother. He got back some fragmented memories. He even remembered that fluorescent-lit room…
But it was all useless.
He still didn’t dare to go to the third floor, still couldn’t remember what happened that year, and still didn’t know who had kidnapped him.
He was still a good-for-nothing hiding behind a hard shell. He caused everyone who loved him to suffer because of his self-paralysis.
How can I recover?
How can I get out?
How can I live like a normal person?
Qiao Shao hugged his knees tightly, and his nails left deep marks on his calf through his pajamas.
With him like this, what qualifications did he have to confess to He Shen?
He Shen was so great. How could he have the nerve to disturb his life?
Qiao Shao didn’t sleep all night. He Shen, too, sat up all night in his rental apartment.
Qiao Shao ignored him completely. He couldn’t get through his mobile phone and he wasn’t replying on WeChat.
He Shen leaned against the sofa, staring unblinkingly straight ahead.
There was no TV in the rental apartment. Only a shoddy painting hung on the wall. It was a print picked up from a street stall for a few bucks; an inferior product with zero appraisal value.
And yet He Shen was staring at it like it was a world famous paintings. Looking clearly at every detail and completely committing it to memory.
He needed this to provide a distraction. He needed to remember something worthless to keep his brain from remembering.
Was having too good a memory really a good thing?
It wasn’t……
When all memories could be played back exactly like a movie, it was absolutely painful.
Good things were remembered clearly, and bad things were remembered clearly.
When someone couldn’t forget, in the end, everything could turn bad.
Just like now, with Qiao Shao ignoring him.
All the little details of their time together became painful memories.
And he will never forget it for his entire life.
After losing his mother five years ago, He Shen decided he would never like anyone else.
Whether friends or lovers, he would no longer need important people in his life.
Because losing was too painful. It was especially cruel to a person who couldn’t forget.
But he met Qiao Shao …
A child who was just like himself five years ago but even frailer and weaker than he was then.
Before He Shen knew it, he was already protecting him by his side. But, he couldn’t protect him throughout his life.
Qiao Shao had become aware of his feelings and began to alienate him. What about the future?
He Shen sighed lightly and tried to stare at the cheap computer print.
——Friends.
He can be friends with Qiao Shao.
As long as Qiao Shao was there, he could still look at him. That would be good enough.
He would never disturb his life.
If Qiao Shao has really grown tired of him, he will change seats when the next semester begins.
He Shen closed his eyes and repeated these two statements in his heart—
There was only one Qiao Shao in this life.
He will never like anyone again.
The next day Qiao Shao logged in to QQ with his mobile phone and saw a message from the president of Mathematics Society. “Brother Larry, how goes your preparations? Don’t forget tomorrow’s league competition! You can answer the questions online. You just have to join in on time. ”
Qiao Shao replied back. “En, I won’t miss it.”
Top Pillar happened to be online, and immediately replied to him. “Actually, you don’t have to be too prepared. You can just perform normally. This time, us two brothers will join forces and crush this group of jokers!”
Qiao Shao was not in a mood to chat, and he wanted to go offline after a few perfunctory sentences. Unexpectedly, Top Pillar added, “Speaking of, I think we have a chance of grabbing first place in this final exam.”
Qiao Shao froze and asked with rapt attention, “How’s that possible?”
Top Pillar said mysteriously, “You were also in the first examination room, weren’t you? Didn’t you see it?”
Qiao Shao was in the first exam room, alright, the butt-end first exam room. He typed quickly. “I didn’t see it, He Shen …” After typing, he realized that he shouldn’t be using his name. After deleting it, he changed to, “did the god of learning not perform well? ”
Top Pillar sighed and said, “Who knows? Every family goes through its own problems. The god of learning handed in a blank paper for his essay composition.”
Qiao Shao’s heart suddenly jumped.
Top Pillar said, “It could be said that the topic this time was really simple. Even elementary school students could write an essay for it. But truth to tell, it was also pretty f*cked up. While I was writing it, I thought of my mother cooking for me at five in the morning and staying up with me as I do my homework til eleven in the evening. I was almost crying myself as I wrote… ”
He gave a long-winded talk, not knowing that there was already no one at the other end of the chat.
Qiao Shao changed his clothes and went out. He couldn’t wait for a taxi and directly asked their chauffer, Uncle Chen, to take him to school.
He wanted to see He Shen. He wanted to see him right now!
How could he be so selfish?
He Shen came to him when he finished his Chinese language test. Why did he drive him away like that?
Faced with such a topic…it was very painful for him. Wouldn’t it also be very painful for He Shen?
Qiao Shao could never ever forget, that time at the basketball court, that tone of voice He Shen used when he told him about his mother’s passing.
What did he do!
He was only concerned about his own suffering and he never thought of He Shen!
Miraculously, now that Qiao Shao was full of worry for He Shen, the shadow that always enveloped him gradually began to dissipate.
Being cared for was undoubtedly important.
Caring for others was also a form of self-salvation.
When Qiao Shao got out of the car, in his mind echoed the words He Shen and he had said–
Parents aren’t the only people in our lives. As long as we go on, we will meet many good people.
Like you.
Like you.
These two words gave Qiao Shao great courage.
He wanted to tell He Shen. He wanted to tell him everything!
Because He Shen considered him as a very good person after losing his mother!
Climbing all the way to the third floor, Qiao Shao was nervous after pressing the doorbell.
The door opened, and He Shen froze when he saw him.
Qiao Shao was afraid that his courage would leave him and so he started talking. “I want to talk to you!”
He Shen’s pupils shrank, and his voice was a little hoarse. “Come in.”
Qiao Shao didn’t dare to go in. He lowered his head and stood ramrod straight. “No need!”
He Shen’s heart seized. He knew what he was about to say.
He had been mentally preparing himself all night but didn’t expect to have to face it so early the very next day.
This way was good too. Better to get it over earlier. Then he could pack away all thoughts that shouldn’t be.
They spoke at the same time, saying two entirely different statements.
Qiao Shao: “I’m sorry. He Shen, I like you!”
He Shen: “I will restrain myself and I won’t like you anymore.”
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Unimportant translator’s note: Actually, the author mentioned before that He Shen lives on the 13th floor.