I’m on a roll.
Maruyama: It feels like it has been a while….
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The Ball Part 1
Translators: Frostfire10
Ainz returned to the Great Underground Tomb of Nazarick, walked into his room, and dropped into his chair.
This rough and crude attitude provided enough inside into his mental state.
"….A ball?"
His whisper contained a variety of ambiguous emotion. The most vocal and despair-inducing of which was 'I can't dance you idiot!' or something along those lines.
As a simple member of society, Ainz had never learnt how to dance. And he could simply take his time to learn later.
However.
If it was known that Archduke Ainz Ooal Gown could not dance, it would have an impact on his impression. From the blurry image of nobles that Ainz had formed in his head, they were high class and placed great importance of seemingly trivial things. Depending on the situation he might lose his honour.
One of these seemingly trivial things was dance.
Especially since there would be members of other countries attending this ball, the impact of any failure would be magnified many times over. Even though there was no precedent of an Archduke being stripped of his title, something of the same magnitude might occur.
If the Ainz who had been so extravagant during the parade were suddenly unable to appear in noble society, what would happen? Obviously, all evaluations of him would fall to rock bottom.
"Maybe an Obon dance…. No, what am I thinking…. I still have time. Then all I have to do is learn how to dance. Even the basics at least."
Ainz steeled himself, and whispered under his breath.
However, this did not ease his worries.
There were two types of people in society.
One was a person who still studied after entering society. The other was the one who stopped. Ainz was the latter, and he had only studied while he was still a student. His brain matter— Well it was unclear whether his current body had such a thing, but that was besides the point— had definitely hardened, and he was worried whether he could learn it or not.
As his non-existent stomach began to ache, Ainz began to realise something, and his empty eyes began to burn with light.
"However…. I don't know anything about proper etiquette. Isn't that also part of the common sense in this world?"
Although Ainz had seen noble society, he was not familiar with it, and he wanted to cradle his head in his arms. I really should not be a noble.
However, he could no longer run.
If he could blame someone, then if Sebas had no dressed him up like that for the parade, he might be in an easier position.
Ainz rang a small bell located on his desk.
Soon after, a knock came from the door.
Ainz nodded at the maid stationed next to the door. The maid nodded in reply, opened the door, and began to speak with the person outside.
She then closed the door and approached Ainz.
"Sebas-sama is here, Ainz-sama."
"Allow him to enter the room."
"Understood."
Ainz had called for Sebas, so it was of course him at the door. However, as a ruler, this bureaucracy was necessary.
Ainz inched his chair to face the door as it clicked open.
All of the NPCs of Nazarick wished for Ainz to remain seating in his chair when welcoming his subordinates.
As a normal person, Ainz was frowning at this ritual, but the boss in him wanted to grant the wishes of his subordinates. As a result, he failed to voice his complaints and he had to perform this ridiculous act.
"Excuse my presence, Ainz-sama."
Sebas the room and bowed towards Ainz. Returning the gesture with a nod, Ainz called him over. Once Sebas came closer, Ainz began to speak.
"Thank you for coming."
"I will come as soon as you call for me."
Ainz was at a loss for words. If he said that he could not dance, their loyalty towards him might change. However, Ainz had no other options. If this indeed did lower their loyalty, he would modify their memory. He steeled himself and asked his question.
"Sebas…. I am actually unable to dance. And so I hope for you to help me…. Are you disappointed? That the master of the Great Underground Tomb of Nazarick is unable to dance."
"No, that is certainly not the case."
Sebas immediately replied.
"If there was nothing that Ainz-sama was bad at, there would be no meaning in our existence. Our greatest desire is for us to be of use to Ainz-sama."
"….Is that so, then accept my gratitude. And allow me to ask you this…. Can you dance?"
"No. My apologies, but that is not something that is part of my responsibilities."
"Well…. That is correct…."
It was the expected answer. Or rather, Ainz could not recall a single NPC within the Great Underground Tomb of Nazarick whom could dance.
As Ainz raised a strange cry within his heart, he recalled an extremely embarrassing moment.
Why did I not write that Pandora's Actor can dance. Isn't this why I made such a meaningless character setting with such extreme reactions?
Regrets are only born after the fact. Ainz truly understood this.
"Then, Sebas. Is there anyone within Nazarick who you believe can dance?"
"Then, how about Demiurge-sama?"
"Demiurge…. He does seem that he would have the knowledge. However, just how much must I rely on Demiurge…."
He had ordered Demiurge to complete several tasks outside of Nazarick, but he had incessantly called him back. Looking back on it, Demiurge was often called back for trivial reasons.
This was as there was no other person whose wisdom rivalled Demiurge and could lead Nazarick. He could leave it to Cocytus during a siege, but the lack of personnel who were intelligent and could be put in charge of Nazarick's general operations was posing a problem
The fact that Ainz was the only one troubled by this was also another problem in itself.
Shalltear, Aura and Cocytus tended to solve their problems by force, and if there was an enemy present, they would take care of them themselves. They did not have the mindset of managers or directors.
Please think a bit more, Ainz was crying in his head. But the Guardians' personalities and thoughts were the result of his friends typing them in, and the ones he should scold would be them.
And Ainz himself was a normal person, and in fact he had no idea whether or not the Guardian's thought process was correct or not.
That was why he had thrown everything onto Demiurge.
(I thought that Fluder would change Nazarick greatly when he pledged his loyalty, but he is obsessed with magic…. And is surprisingly useless….)
Fluder was fixated upon learning extremely powerful spells, and so he strangely lacked knowledge of the Empire— Especially that related to noble society. This was as he had unwaveringly focused on peering into the abyss of magic. And because the Emperors of the past had acknowledged him.
And because Fluder was that type of person, he had completely submitted himself to the powerful Ainz, but at times like these, he was no very useful.
"It cannot be helped. Let us ask Demiurge."
"Will that be fine? Or shall I check with everyone within Nazarick to see if anyone can dance?"
"Ah yes…. Please do that. There might be someone outside of my knowledge who can dance."
"Yes!"
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After the spell reached its time limit, Ainz slowly hung his head in his arms, but suddenly stopped. Because the maid from earlier was currently in his office with him.
It was true that Sebas had told him that he could treat the maids like they were air, and that he did not have to mind them, but Ainz still believed that he should play the part of a ruler. That was why he could not hang his head in his arms.
However, Ainz still wanted to do it, and so he stood up and spoke to the maid.
"I shall take my leave, but I will be in the bed room. Should anyone come, have them wait here and call for me."
"Understood, Ainz-sama."
Looking away from the deeply bowing maid, Ainz headed towards his bed room.
Inside was a large king-sized canopy bed affixed to the room. Ainz threw himself upon it.
While enjoying the feeling of having his body sink into the mattress, Ainz removed his shoes and crawled into the centre.
Letting out a relaxed sigh, Ainz began to roll about.
"This is bad…. For even Demiurge to not know much about dance…. This was outside of expectations…."
This is bad, this is bad. Ainz rolled about in his bed.
His one saving grace was that there would usually be etiquette masters present who would give directions during rehearsals. All he had to do was memorise what they said.
However, there was one problem. It was often the case that the Emperor, or someone of equal standing, would dance first at balls. If he messed up, it would be seen by all of the nobles, and he also had to find a top notch partner to go with him.
If his unease were stronger, it would be forcefully repressed, but his current state of mind had not reached the threshold yet. Ainz continued to let out more grunts as he once again rolled about. It was like he was no longer an old uncle, but had instead regressed to a child.
The previously pristine sheets were now covered in wrinkles, but Ainz had no excess mental capacity to mind.
"Now I can only hope for Sebas to find someone whom I don't know…. Does such a person exist?"
He had mentally looked through all of the NPCs in his head, and found nothing.
And as Ainz rolled about in his bed, his sharp senses picked up the sound of panicked and rushed footsteps. All of the Guild Members' rooms, including Ainz's were soundproof. Despite this, and that Ainz did not spec into hearing, this person's loud and hasty footfalls could be heard.
"….This is…. The maid?"
Ainz's guess was correct, and the bedroom was soon knocked on. The pattern of the rhythm was uniform and without panic, but that was probably because it was Ainz's bedroom and so at least the minimum amount of etiquette was necessary.
Ainz slid off the bed, put on his shoes and checked his clothes.
They were wrinkled, but they could be straightened out immediately. Ainz nodded and opened the door.
"What is it? I told you not to disturb me."
"Yes! Ainz-sama, apologies for disturbing your rest. But there is someone who is here due to the request for a dance teacher."
"What!"
A bright flame burned within Ainz's eyes.
"Is that so! Guide them in immediately!"
Even though he had told her to guide them in, they were definitely in the office. Ainz slipped past the maid and entered the corridor.
The maid rushed to keep pace with him, but Ainz's heart was filled with expectation and his footsteps were light and quick.
He forced open the door to his office.
He looked around expectantly. Inside were Yuri Alpha, Shizu Delta, Narberal Gamma and Sebas.
It was entirely possible that the women might have dancing written into their settings. Ainz nodded in agreement, and gestured towards the bowing three.
As he was about to voice his surprise at there being three of them—
"—Oh Ainz-sama. It has been too long. It brings me great joy to see you again."
Suddenly, the voice of a fifth person could be heard. It was male, but it was not Sebas.
In a panic, Ainz looked towards its source, and due to it being hidden by the desk earlier, he had failed to see it, but now it had shown itself.
Standing there was a 30 centimetre tall cockroach.
His crimson mantle embroidered with golden trimming draped from his shoulders, and a gold crown adorned his head. The head of his royal sceptre held a stone of pure alabaster. And even though he was standing up straight, his head had turned to face Ainz.
There was no way that Ainz did not know of him.
"Kyouhukou!"
"Haha! Ainz-sama. It is I, your loyal servant, Kyouhukou."
He gave the most elegant bow. His grace and poise rivalled that of Demiurge.
While secretly wondering 'how did he bend his waist?' in shock, Ainz kept a calm face and replied.
"Thank you for coming. And so…. Why have you come?"
"Oh? I have heard from Sebas-dono that you were searching for those who could teach dance. And I, believing that I could help, have arrive upon Silver."
Ainz roughly understood why the maid had panicked.
"I, I see…. But, Silver? What is that?"
"Yes. It is my golem mount, the Silver Golem Cockroach."
"……..Did we have that?"
"Yes. It is a golem that Luci★fer-sama created. Its body is comprised of an alloy of extremely rare metals, and was coated in the extremely rare metal Star Silver. It far surpasses me in power, being about Level 70."
In the corner of Ainz's eye, he saw one of the battlemaids stumble. This action gave him an insight into how shocked she was.
This was natural of course.
Ainz nodded. Although it was a golem, it was a strange feeling to know that a cockroach was far stronger than you.
However, Ainz did not have the emotional capacity to comfort her. Because there was a certain sentence that he could not ignore.
"……..Thaaaat bastaaaaard…….Mixing all of them together…."
Due to the mine of rare magical metals being stolen from them, the metals that Ainz Ooal Gown originally had a monopoly on finally reached the market. Along with a proclamation to not sell any to them. And thus obtaining such metals were extremely difficult.
Of course, they had mined out several veins and had obtained an amount that far exceeded what they needed for normal production, but the metals were rarely used for random reasons like making a golem.
Ainz himself would normally switch out such metals with replacements during crafting.
However, his anger immediately subsided. There was no point in pursuing the matter. In fact, it had now become a fond memory in his mind. It was pointless to get angry.
And there was a more pressing problem.
Ainz gazed upon Kyouhukou, and felt a variety of emotions.
In what world was there a person who was taught by a cockroach?
Ainz was assailed by a wave of indescribable emotions, but before they were suppressed, they had swallowed him whole. If there was nothing else, he had to go through with it.
He would become the first human—technically he was undead but nevermind. That was how Ainz convinced himself.
"….I will be relying on you, Kyouhukou."
"Understood, Ainz-sama. I shall teach you to the level where you can attend any Cockroach Ball you desire."
Ainz excluded a certain portion of Kyouhukou's sentence that he did not want to hear.
"….Is that so, that is very heartening! And so my dance partner will be…. Kyouhukou? Or will it be a female cockroach? Performing an air dance by myself will be a bit harsh."
"No no. There will be a problem due to the disparity between our sizes. And being alone will require more time to refine your skills. A partner is absolutely necessary for dancing. And so, is anyone else proficient at dance? If possible, it should be someone who is knowledgeable of the society that Ainz-sama will be dancing in."
There was no such person. As mentioned earlier, Fluder knew nothing of dance.
Ainz racked his brains, but to no avail.
Should I kidnap a noble?
As he was about to implement this extremely dangerous plan, Sebas spoke.
"Oh yes, there was someone at Shalltear's place, a noble daughter of the Empire yes?"
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Maruyama:
I shall add one more chapter to this halted work. Enter flag!
Sorry for it being so short…. The next one would be in September? Depending on how the novelisation goes, it might be sooner, or later.