Chapter 187 - Arc 12: Ruyi Xianzhuang | Chapter 187: Secret Love
Translator: Lynn
Suppressing the tumultuous emotions within him, waves flickered in Xu Ziqing’s eyes, and he responded with a customary smile, “Rest assured, Shixiong, I will certainly not pursue this.” Yun Lie nodded, and a softness entered his gaze.
Since Yun Lie declined Mu Ronghua, no one else approached him. However, Xu Ziqing, understanding his feelings for Yun Lie, felt a growing distance in their interactions. He could no longer be as close as before.
After two days like this, Xu Ziqing felt he couldn’t continue in this manner. The closeness to his senior brother made it hard for him to remain composed. So, he devised a plan.
On this particular day, Xu Ziqing stepped out of his room and looked at the stern figure in the courtyard immersed in sword realization. He spoke, “Senior brother, I wish to go outside.”
Yun Lie raised his eyes, “For cultivation?”
Xu Ziqing affirmed, “Yes.”
Yun Lie nodded slightly and then rose.
Seeing this, Xu Ziqing knew his senior brother was prepared to accompany him again. Wasn’t this contrary to his intent? Although he was increasingly moved by his brother’s care, he quickly intervened, saying, “This time, I’ve suddenly felt a longing to go for a walk. Please don’t trouble yourself, Shixiong.” In truth, he desired a solitary journey.
Yun Lie hesitated.
When Xu Ziqing witnessed this, an array of emotions churned within. Yet, this decision was a result of careful consideration, one he couldn’t alter midway. He recalled the happiness he felt due to his senior brother’s care and believed he needed some time alone to figure out how to act and interact with his senior brother in the future.
Yun Lie gazed at Xu Ziqing for a moment, then sat down cross-legged once more. However, he raised his hand, and a black light was directed at Xu Ziqing.
Xu Ziqing reached out and caught it—an inscribed talisman, weighty and imbued with an enigmatic power. A mere touch made it feel incredibly sharp and dominant. He knew instantly that this was a manifestation of his senior brother’s sword intent. He couldn’t help but feel a rush of warmth. Taking a deep breath, he expressed, “Thank you, Shixiong. I’ll depart now.”
Yun Lie remained silent, entering a meditative state.
Xu Ziqing didn’t delay further and turned to leave. Once outside, he meticulously closed the door.
In the past few days, he was almost always by his senior brother’s side. To prevent his senior brother from catching any hints, he hadn’t allowed himself to consider things. Now, he was seeking a tranquil place to contemplate.
Beyond the courtyard’s gate, the Wanlan Flower World bustled with activity due to the “blind date.” Numerous male and female cultivators strolled together, some already forming connections during their interactions.
Seeing this burgeoning atmosphere of romance, Xu Ziqing’s eyes dimmed momentarily. Employing the wood escape technique, he swiftly vanished into the distance.
Navigating through countless flowers and trees, Xu Ziqing’s heart swelled with emotions, surging bit by bit.
At this moment, a flood of memories concerning his relationship with his senior brothers flashed through Xu Ziqing’s mind.
Ultimately, it stemmed from being seen as someone they relied upon from the start, someone they would always accompany in the future. Yet, despite experiencing two lifetimes, for various reasons, he remained ignorant about love and its true essence.
Therefore, as love grew deeper and deeper, he finally became aware of it. Yet, at this point, he couldn’t extricate himself. He could only conceal a fragment of affection in his heart, unable to halt it, compelling him to savor it in secret.
Feeling overwhelmed, he lost track of how much time he spent contemplating. Xu Ziqing impulsively utilized the wood escape technique, and before he realized it, he had wandered off his path.
Before him lay a forest of rugged trees, unlike the delicate flora seen outside. This forest was thick and exceptionally dense.
The wood element’s aura here was potent, and the air was remarkably fresh, clearing one’s mind and soul.
At this moment, Xu Ziqing was concealed within an exceedingly thick tree. The rich woody scent enveloped him, akin to being immersed in warm water. It was an immensely comforting feeling, prompting him to sit cross-legged amidst the trees, reluctant to leave.
All was tranquil, and in this quietude, he pondered his feelings for his senior brother once more, finally comprehending his emotions.
Reflecting upon it… In reality, even having admiration for his senior brother was quite ordinary.
His senior brother possessed a majestic presence, an astonishing aura, immense potential, an unwavering Dao heart, and an outstanding temperament. If it weren’t for others often shying away due to misunderstandings, anyone who knew him even slightly could easily develop a favorable impression.
Moreover, such a remarkable figure among figures, within his capacity, not only took care of everything for Xu Ziqing but also truly cared for him. How rare… Under such circumstances, it would be rare for Xu Ziqing to harbor feelings for another.
At this moment, Xu Ziqing suddenly grasped why he had avoided facing this reality.
It wasn’t that he couldn’t accept his admiration for his senior brother, but rather, he feared that if his senior brother found out, it would affect their existing relationship… He was intimately familiar with his senior brother’s temperament. If he were to confess his feelings now, his senior brother would undoubtedly decline, but beyond that, he wouldn’t feel repulsed or disdainful of him. On the contrary, he might feel a tinge of regret.
Having known each other for numerous years, he and his senior brother had already forged a profound bond, so why disrupt their flawless connection?
Furthermore, his senior brother’s heart was transparent and devoted to the Dao. Even though he suppressed his emotions, he still loved him. If that were the case, how could he bear to let his privately budding emotions disrupt his senior brother’s peace of mind?
The journey to immortality was arduous. Xu Ziqing recognized that he had only just embarked on the immortal path, his foundation was far from stable, and he couldn’t measure up to his senior brother in any way. After confessing his feelings, he wouldn’t stand on equal footing with his senior brother.
The path to immortality was challenging. His love for his senior brother, in essence, was simply desiring to be with him day and night. Presently, he had nearly achieved it, yet the burgeoning love in his heart drew him closer to his senior brother’s heart. Even if his senior brother remained unaware, it was inconsequential.
Contemplating this, a smile graced Xu Ziqing’s lips.
Throughout the years, he had followed his senior brother wherever he went, and he had firmly resolved to continue doing so in the future.
When he attained significant success in cultivation, he could accompany his senior brother on the immortal journey. It was a great fortune for him that his senior brother did not reject him. What more could one ask for?
People often say, “Sorrow arises from love, fear arises from love, and if there is no love and hatred, there is no worry and no fear. But the heart’s worries and fears all stem from greed. If greed is left unchecked, it fosters hatred and jealousy.”
Xu Ziqing pondered, wondering if one day, if his senior brother became a Daoist couple, would he succumb to jealousy and hatred, desiring to harm his senior brother? After careful consideration, he realized he might experience jealousy but not hatred, only profound regret!
Though he had desires, his senior brother’s well-being was more significant to him.
Gradually, as Xu Ziqing comprehended his feelings, his thoughts grew clearer.
He decided to conceal this love that had quietly sprouted in his heart. No need to overanalyze; no need to fret. He already held his senior brother in high regard, and this reverence would only deepen in the future. There was no need to worry.
Given his senior brother’s dedication to seeking the Tao, he wouldn’t become a Taoist partner in the near future. He would have the opportunity to accompany his senior brother for a long time.
Xu Ziqing believed that if, after many years, his senior brother still held affection for someone else, and it wasn’t him, despite their years together, then perhaps it was fate, and there was no need to force it.
After organizing his emotions, Xu Ziqing felt a newfound clarity in his mind, as if barriers in his heart had been shattered, improving his mood.
He realized there was a looming inner demon trying to dominate his consciousness, making things challenging. However, because he gained clarity in time, he swiftly vanquished it with a heart sword, preventing its manifestation.
For cultivators, whenever they approach a new realm, inner demons are inevitable.
These inner demons are a reflection of the heart and often arise due to emotions.
One can either forget these feelings, sever them, or comprehend the seven emotions. Only by being transparent in all things, unburdened by emotions, can one rid oneself of such inner demons, break through the tribulation, and ascend to a higher level.
This “love” isn’t merely romantic love—it encompasses love among family, friends, confidantes, grievances, and more. Among them, the love and affection between family and friends are the most challenging to comprehend and can cause the most self-inflicted suffering.
Over the years, numerous cultivators and even powerful cultivators were harmed by love and couldn’t transcend this obstacle. In the end, their lives were lost, their paths were extinguished, and their pursuit of immortality was in vain.
When Xu Ziqing asked himself this question, he didn’t let go of his affection for his senior brother; rather, he gained clear insight into this affection and accepted it. Henceforth, the love in his heart would not hinder him but to accompany him forever.
Fortunate, incredibly fortunate.
Even when his cultivation base was still in its infancy, he had seen through his affection for his senior brother and could manage his emotions. Otherwise, as one’s cultivation deepens, encountering the concept of “love” might not be as easily comprehended. If not careful, one might sink deeper and deeper, eventually succumbing to obsession. Ultimately, this would lead to self-destruction and harm to others.
With an improved state of mind, the “Ten Thousand Woods Great Heart Planting Technique” immediately accelerated its operation, even surpassing its previous speed, verging on a frenzy.
Xu Ziqing’s eyes remained tightly shut, devoid of any hint of woodland energy seeping from his form. Instead, it continued to penetrate deep into his being.
At this moment, he still sat within the colossal tree. Strangely, the surrounding aura of the heavens and earth remained unresponsive, and even the tree concealing him exhibited no anomalies.
Had someone been able to peer through the bark, they would have witnessed a young man in a green shirt, his skin displaying a texture reminiscent of tree bark.
It was akin to being pricked by the Qingyun needles.
Xu Ziqing sensed he had entered an unusual state, gradually merging with this ancient tree. He seemed to experience the myriad memories of this millennial giant.
There were moments of joy, anger, sorrow, and happiness, as well as a deep-rooted reluctance toward solitude. Ultimately, it descended into desolation and a somber mood.
This sensation slowly submerged into his consciousness, and Xu Ziqing began to regain his awareness.
Now that his mind was clear, it was time to return. He realized he had been acting strangely these days, and his brother must be quite puzzled. He really shouldn’t have.
Just as he contemplated this, the lines on Xu Ziqing’s face began to fade, and he prepared to exit.
However, in the next instant, a profoundly perilous foreboding swept over him!
An immensely potent spiritual consciousness was scouring in all directions, mighty and expansive, far beyond his ability to resist!
Startled, Xu Ziqing’s dantian surged with energy, his face swiftly acquiring the markings of the tree’s bark. Soon, his body’s surface resembled that of the surrounding trees.
He couldn’t leave; an ominous warning took shape within him. He couldn’t afford to leave at this critical moment.
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