Chapter 202: What's the right answer?
Shishio walked for a moment before he stopped on the stairs right below where Miu sobbed. Hearing her sobbing voice, he clenched his fists since he knew that had hurt her.
'Was it a good decision?'
Shishio knew that it was crueler to give someone false hope, and he knew that he couldn't be a perfect lover for Miu. He had always thought that he could make them happy by dating everyone, but not only had he caused Saki and Nana to cry before, he also caused Miu to cry. As for Ritsu and Shiina, he wasn't sure, but he could tell that their condition wasn't much better than Miu's right now.
'I need to solve this now.'
With such a thought on his mind, Shishio started to move forward.
---
Miu was still hugging her knees, sobbing quietly, sitting in the middle of the stairs of the apartment building, but suddenly...
"Senpai."
Hearing this voice, Miu was stunned and looked up. "Shishio-kun?" She had thought that Shishio had gone back, but she didn't expect him to appear right in front of her.
"I know that you don't want to see me right now, but can we talk for a moment?" Shishio said while squatting down, trying to lower his height to match Miu's gaze.
With a slightly reddened face, Miu nodded gently, but unlike the usual panicked expression, she was calm and said, "Yes."
Shishio sat next to Miu, then gave a can of warm tea to Miu. "Hold it first, Senpai."
His casual gentleness caused her heart to tremble. It was fairly cold on a spring night, which was why when Shishio gave her a can of warm tea, Miu hesitated since the more beautiful memory that she had with him, the more painful it became when she knew that they couldn't be together. "No..." Her voice trembled when she rejected his offer, but her hand was held by him without hesitation, and the can of warm tea was put on her hand.
Feeling the warmth in her palm, Miu bit her lower lip and lowered her head. "You have always been so forceful, Shishio-kun." She remembered their first meeting when Shishio helped her pay for her book, it was a memorable and precious memory, and she thought it might be the beginning of the love story like in the shoujo manga. Still, the reality was different from shoujo manga, she couldn't be her special one, and she was just a senior from the same school that he met by chance.
Holding the can of warm tea in her hands tightly, Miu really wanted to run right now, but...
"I'm sorry," Shishio said.
Miu was stunned, but then she asked him with a trembling voice, "...Why did you apologize?"
"That I have hurt you," Shishio said as he closed his eyes, feeling the buzzing feeling on his head slowly disappear. He calmed himself for a moment before he opened it again. He had been on an emotional roller coaster for the past few days from up to down so suddenly, which gave him headaches sometimes, and even though he wasn't the one who was in pain, seeing Miu, Shiina, and Ritsu showed such a painful expression, it also hurt him.
Shishio knew that he often talked lightly about creating a harem here and there. Still, when it really happened, there was no way that a girl could be happy with such a relationship, and the reason why they could accept it was probably because of his persistence and how they loved him so much. When he thought about their love and used them so he could date more girls, he couldn't help but feel that he was really a scumbag.
'But...'
It was too late, Shishio had stepped into this path, and if he backed down, then everything would crumble, and he would hurt everyone, so right now, he couldn't doubt himself and believed in himself that he could make them happy.
'Even though I can't say that I love them?'
Shishio couldn't help but fall into self-depreciation at how low he was. He often talked bad about people, but he also wasn't much better.
Hearing Shishio's apologies, Miu looked at him in surprise, and somehow his huge body that always protected her and gave her reassurance was full of wounds at this moment. She could only shake her head and said, "No, I have always taken your gentleness as something for granted while thinking that I'll have your gentleness forever, but I know that we can't stay like that forever, and we'll change along the way." She looked at him and said, "But I have never regretted meeting you, and I'm happy to know you, Shishio-kun."
"Senpai..." Shishio looked at Miu in surprise.
"I have always heard that the matter of heart can't be controlled, and when you fall in love with someone, you will fall with them, so I can't blame you," Miu said with a smile. In truth, it was so painful for her, it was so painful to know that Shishio couldn't be with her, but she also didn't have a right to force him to be with her. She only realized that she was selfish, but it couldn't be helped since she knew that she had fallen for him. Even though that love couldn't be reciprocated, she still treasured this feeling, and hopefully, their relationship couldn't change from now on. She looked at Shishio and asked, "How about you, Shishio-kun? Have you regretted meeting me?"
"I...." Shishio looked at Miu for a moment before he showed a smile and said, "I'm glad to meet you, Senpai. It is fun to be with you, especially when you have always shown a cute expression when I teased you."
"Shishio-kun...." Miu was lost for words and couldn't help but hit his arm lightly while pouting, showing that she was unhappy.
Both of them laughed together before Shishio looked at Miu sadly and said, "But I might not be able to tease you more now."
"Hmm...." Even though Miu felt a bit annoyed that she was often being teased, and right now, she should feel happy that Shishio wouldn't tease her again, but she felt sad and lonely somehow.
'If only...'
Miu then shook her head and knew that there wasn't any 'if only...' in this world, Shishio wasn't her boyfriend, and he had a girlfriend. She didn't want to show her sad expression to him. She forced herself to smile while looking at him and asked, "So can you tell me who this lucky girl is? Who is your girlfriend?" She was curious who his girlfriend was, wondering who was the one that had melted his heart. After all, she also knew how popular Shishio was. If they didn't meet by chance and they weren't someone from the same club, she often doubted whether both of them could know each other.
When Shishio was being asked this question, he felt a bit hesitant for a moment, but in the end, he said, "It's Nana..."
"Ah, I see, it's Nana!" Before Shishio finished his words, Miu quickly cut his words and seemed to have expected this. After all, she knew how close Shishio and Nana were. Both of them were from the same class and sat next to each other, so when she heard that Nana was his girlfriend, she didn't feel surprised, especially when Nana was so beautiful and smart. Not only that, but Nana's boobs were also...
Miu then looked down and looked at her chest, which made her sigh. "You should make her happy since you have dated her, and don't tease other girls again since you might cause her to feel jealous and misunderstanding, least you might cause...." She then closed her mouth since she felt that she was talking about herself. She knew that Shishio's charm was lethal for a girl, and it was quite normal for them to fall in love with him, which was why she didn't say it since she would confess her love to him if she said that.
'But confess?' Miu thought at that moment, but then she quickly shook her head and continued to talk.
Looking at Miu, who became excited, Shishio quickly stopped her and said, "Wait, Senpai, listen to me!"
"Huh?"
"I have dated Nana, but I have also dated Saki." Shishio took a deep breath and said, "I date two girls at the same time."
"...."
Miu's eyes and mouth were wide open, and she couldn't believe what she had heard. She then started to frown and asked, "Did you do two-timing on them?"
"No, I got their consent at the same time. We have decided to date together," Shishio said without hesitation, telling the truth to Miu.
"....." Miu couldn't react for a moment, and she also wasn't sure what to say either since what she had heard was too shocking.
"I know that you might not be able to accept it, and I can't blame you if you think that it is wrong either, but this is the only way that I can do to make both of them happy." Shishio looked at Miu with a bitter smile and said, "Sorry to disappoint you, Senpai." He knew that because of "common sense," there was no way their relationship could be accepted, but he couldn't care about it. The only thing that he cared about was that he knew that he had disappointed Miu.
After a moment of shock, Miu still felt slightly dizzy, then asked gently, "Nana and Saki have decided to date you together?"
"Un." Shishio nodded.
Miu looked at Shishio and asked, "Do you think it is right?"
"I have never thought about whether my relationship is wrong or right since I don't think there's a right or wrong in love," Shishio said.
"But how can you be responsible for them? There isn't going to be a good future for the three of you, you know?" Miu asked with a frown. If Shishio had only one girlfriend, then she wouldn't say much, but he had two!
"Senpai, I won't ask you to accept our relationship or not, and the reason why I've told you this is that I don't want to lie to you. As for whether it is right or not, it doesn't really matter since I have prepared myself. As for the future, you don't need to worry since I have the power to make both of them happy," Shishio said.
'How?'
Miu wanted to ask that question, but she closed her mouth since she knew that he wouldn't heed her words, and she also knew that he had the power to make both Saki and Nana happy. However, she really wanted to say something, and at the same time, she felt slightly bitter since inwardly, she wondered whether she could also ask the same thing?
Shishio could date two girls, then what if there was one more?
Such a question appeared on Miu's head one after another, which made her confused since her common sense told her that this relationship wasn't right, but who was the one who decided right and wrong?
"Senpai!"
"Ah!" Miu was then awoken and looked at Shishio with a confused expression.
"Senpai, I might only have realized that there's no right or wrong in feeling since a feeling is something intangible, and we can't see it. Using your head, you won't see the answer, so you need to see it with something below."
"Below?" Miu looked at Shishio with some confusion.
Shishio looked straight into Miu's eyes without dodging them and said, "It's using our heart." He pointed his finger at his heart and smiled. "Your heart knows the best about you."
"My heart..." Miu blinked her eyes and touched her heart.
"I know in my heart that I want both Nana and Saki, and both Saki and Nana also know in their heart that they want me, so the three of us decide to date each other," Shishio said.
"....." Miu stared at Shishio, and somehow all the thoughts on her head had been cleared.
Shishio looked at Miu and took a deep breath, and after a moment, he made up his decision and said, "Senpai, what I'm about to say might make you hate me, or even want to punch me, but I know what my heart wants, and Senpai... I want you."
Miu was surprised before her cute face blushed!
"You have always given me a smile, being with you always makes me comfortable, and I can't let other guys bully you. The right to bully you is mine," Shishio said while holding both her small and cute hands.
"Yo - You don't have that right! You can't bully me!" Miu quickly retorted with a red face.
"Then can I have the right to have you?" Shishio asked, staring at Miu's eyes gently.
Miu blinked her eyes, and her face was so red that it gradually spread into her neck. Still, when she saw his expression, she knew that she also needed to answer his request with the answer that came from her heart, but even so, she was still nervous. After all, it was her first time, she was being confessed!
Her heart raced, and she felt that her heart was filled with something that almost burst, but she didn't hate this feeling. She took a deep breath then said timidly, "Le - Let me think about it, and... and can I ask both Saki and Nana?" She didn't dare to look into his eyes since she might have an impulse somehow if she looked into it.
Shishio nodded and said, "Take your time since I know that it isn't a decision that you can make hastily."
"Will you wait?" Miu asked, looking at Shishio.
"I will wait, but..."
"But?"
"Let me give you something so you can help you make up your mind," Shishio said.
"Wh --?!" Miu wanted to ask, but suddenly her lips were kissed!
Miu was stunned, but she didn't push him, and slowly she closed her eyes, and when their lips parted, she blinked her eyes, staring at the man who had stolen her first kiss, and wasn't sure what to say for a moment, but then her face and neck gradually turned red, and she felt that her heart was almost burst.
Shishio patted Miu's head gently and said, "I'll go back now."
"Um." Miu nodded shyly, staring at his back that left slowly before she plopped on the ground with a reddened face. Her feelings were mixed at that moment, it was complex and complicated, but at the same time, she was so happy that it almost burst her heart. She sat on the stairs for a moment before she heard the sound of his motorcycle. She quickly stood up and walked to the edge of the stairs, staring at him, who had left her apartment building. Touching her heart, she recalled what he had told her before.
'Use your heart, huh?'
Watching him suddenly turn his head and smile at her brought a smile to her face and caused her to wave her hand. Then, realizing her reaction, she knew that even though she might resist, her body was honest.
Miu wasn't sure about her feeling right now since all the common sense on her head was smashed right away by him, and she was in confusion, but one thing for sure, she didn't hate the feeling of her lips being taken by him.