53. Insecurity
YILEYNA
I awoke with a start, jolting upright in bed. I scanned the room frantically.
Alone.
I was alone.
My heart was pounding, and once again, the nightmare of the night my parents were killed was replaying
in my mind. I ran my trembling hand through my hair, closing my eyes as the emotions that I tried to
control hit me full force.
Focus Yileyna, it’s ok. It’s going to be ok…
No, it wasn’t ok… They died saving me and were marked as traitors. They were not traitors!
I had to prove their innocence! I had to…
Goddess…
I wrapped my arms around my legs, burying my head in my knees.
Focus.
Breathe…
What time was it? Where was Theon? Was he still not back?
‘They’re dead.’ Theon’s words from that night rang in my head, I felt the crushing agony in my chest
break its restraint and hit me brutally. It was my fault. They died because of me.
I won’t cry.
I can’t.
But I was unable to stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks as I pressed a fist against my chest,
trying to control the pain that threatened to drown me.
It was my fault. They died because I was out there… Dad came to protect me.
A strangled sob left my lips, and I curled up, dropping onto my side. The memories of that night, the
wolves… the bodies… the fire… they played before my eyes like a horror show on repeat.
Stop. Stop, Yileyna…
Think of something else…
Why did I have these odd abilities? How was it possible? The daughter of two werewolves having
elemental magic?
I didn’t look like them. The fear of the unknown terrified me and I wanted it all to just go away. The
bedroom door opened, and I quickly tried to cover my face, hoping Theon thought I was asleep “Yileyna.”
I tried to turn away, not wanting him to see my tears, but he was stronger than me, taking hold of my
arms and forcing me to turn towards him. A frown creased his brow, his shirt was hanging open, his hair
was a mess as if he had run his fingers through it repeatedly, and the distinct smell of alcohol was
coming from him.
I looked away, not wanting him to see the tears that were streaming down my cheeks.
“What happened?”
His voice was husky and low, but it was missing the coldness it usually held, almost sounding
‘concerned.
I hated being weak, I hated him seeing me like this. “Nothing. Nothing happened.” I whispered, trying to
pull free from his hold, but he refused to let me go, pulling me upright and straight into his arms. My
breath hitched, I fought to control my emotions as he held me tightly.
“What’s wrong, little storm?” He whispered, stroking my back.
I was unable to control the sob that left my lips.
I couldn’t reply, knowing if I did, I would lose all control of my emotions. I locked my arms around his neck
and he instantly pulled me closer, sitting back on the ground with me straddling him. My breasts were
crushed against his chest, and his arms felt like a shield, protecting me from the world as he gently
rocked me in his lap.
It didn’t seem like it was something Theon would do, sure he was comforting, but the emotions and
concern that seemed to be in his eyes and touch… Maybe it was the alcohol in his system, but I didn’t
care, I needed something to keep me tethered from drowning in my pain, and he was here for me. He
rubbed my back, sending sparks of pleasure through me, burying his head in my neck. We remained like
that for a while, his scent and touch giving me the strength I needed to regain control of my emotions.
“Talk to me, Yileyna.”
I know we argued earlier, but I was ready to open up to him. I was tired of keeping it inside. But I couldn’t
talk about them when they were branded traitors.
“I miss them.” I whispered, pulling back so I could look into those amber eyes that I loved so much.
His eyes shadowed and he looked away.
“I know…”
“I don’t care… I don’t care if one of them or both are not my blood, they are still my parents.
They were my world.” I said quietly.
I knew the revelation from earlier had only triggered these emotions within me, but I couldn’t stop them.
He nodded, but didn’t say anything. Instead, he reached up and cupped my neck, his thumbs brushing
away my tears, only for more to fall in their place.
“I lost them… Then I felt like everything was being snatched from my grasp… I know you deserve to be
Beta… But when it was taken away from me, I felt like the last part of Mom and Dad I had was taken
from me too.” I couldn’t look into his eyes anymore.
I hated feeling so vulnerable, but I wasn’t able to control these emotions. I was breaking and I needed to
tell someone…
I gripped his wrists, the pain of my memories twisting within me. “I’m scared of losing everything I love…”
I said quietly, looking up into his shimmering eyes. I’m scared of losing you. I love you. I didn’t need to
say it because I knew he understood.
Would I push him away by acting so vulnerable and needy? I wasn’t sure, but I couldn’t keep it inside of
me any longer. It hurt so much…
“Your parents…” I wasn’t sure what he was going to say but he took a deep breath, looking at me
sharply, and I knew he had changed his mind. “They were traitors. Let the pain go.” I shook my head.
“No, they were framed. My parents are not traitors. Something or someone did this. I knew my parents,
they would never do this.” I said desperately. How can he say that? He knew my father! “And I’m going to
find out the truth.”
He frowned; his eyes sharp as he tilted my head up slightly. “You might regret what you find out.” He said
quietly.
“No, I won’t, because I know they were innocent.”
Our eyes met, and he didn’t reply, before clenching his jaw and nodding slightly.
“You’re strong Yileyna… Even when the world turns its back on you, I know you’ll be ok.” He said quietly,
almost as if he was speaking to himself over me. It confused me but I still nodded.
“I will.”
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