I end up falling asleep in the second leg of our journey as it got dark quicker than anticipated, a sign a
storm was moving in fast, and the rain was the first of it. Somehow the lull and motion of the car, the
long straight roads, and soft music on the stereo, made me pass out stone cold for over an hour.
I wake up stretching out like a cat, momentarily disorientated, and manage to push Arrick in the
shoulder with my hand as I uncurl it sleepily.
“She’s alive.” He jokes and catches my hand to pull off him, nestling it back down on my lap with a pat.
I yawn, stretching my arms upwards instead, slide both feet out of my shoes, rest them on his dash and
wiggle down to get comfy. I have always liked to curl my legs up when he’s driving.
“How far now?” I ask sleepily, turning on my side a little to watch him in the semi-darkness. The only
real illumination is the array of lights on the dash in here, and all the traffic and streetlights outside.
Arrick glances my way, automatically brushing my hair off my face with his fingers and then puts his
hand back on the wheel. I blush with that internal gush of warmth at something so natural and familiar.
“We’re about ten minutes out, turning off here.” He nods out into the darkness at some illuminated sign
that I recognize, and I sigh heavily. Reality hitting home that I’m so very close to the worst yelling match
in hell. I don’t even want to think about Leila and how she’s going to react when I’m in the same room
as her.
“Nervous?” Arrick glances across at me.
“Majorly.” I sigh and watch him drive, watch the way he looks so effortlessly male and relaxed, always
in control of everything around him, and I envy that his feet have always been planted so firmly on the
ground in all things.
“Just remember they love you, and everything they say, or do, is because they care. I’ll be right there.”
Arrick leans out and squeezes my knee reassuringly. I start welling up inside, eyes glued to his profile
once more, contemplating what life would be like if I didn’t let him back in. What life will be like if he
puts distance between us, chooses her and a life with her. I shove it all deep down as something that I
have no control over and don’t want to mull over. Distracting myself by looking at that sexy muscle
flinch in his jaw, the way he cutely furrows his brow and then raises them in the center as he reads a
passing sign.
Crazily adorable.
“What’s that look all about?” The smile that follows his head turn my way, makes me smile too.
“You know?... Just …” I shrug and glance away, sitting up in my seat properly so I can look at where
we’re going, instead of at him. Trying not to fixate on all the things about him that are unfairly cute, a
little too likeable, and make my heart rate rise.
“Just?” Arrick laughs and nudges me lightly. Playful mode coming back between us after
companionable hours in a car together. The awkwardness about our predicament is less ‘there’. At
moments like this, it all seems surreal, like it’s not even happened, and we both forget there is another
issue between us.
“I’m glad I stopped cutting you out. I’m glad you’re here with me now.” I keep my eyes forward, staring
at the rear of the car in front, seriously. Unable to look at him while this close to tears again, this
emotional about everything as we near another hoedown with my family.
“You had no chance of keeping me out. I love you, Sophs. Even with my head all over the place and
confused as hell, I know that I love you, whatever way that is.” His voice is suddenly hoarse, he too
watching the road and his mirrors, and I catch the flicker of his head turning my way for a second.
“Can we get past this?” I sigh heavily this time, emotionally fragile with new tears building up in my
chest as I ponder the fact there is still a very good chance that I may have to accept he will always be
Natasha’s, and I still have that hurdle to cross.
“I hope so. I can’t imagine life without you. I don’t want to.” Arrick’s voice is softer this time, he sounds
unsure too. A moment of real doubt passing between us and neither has the guts to actually say it out
loud.
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