Sheffield fished out his phone and called Joshua. "Dude, when do you get off work? Wait, in fact, why not just skip work today? I have a really expensive bottle of wine. Care to join me for a drink?"
If this were in the past, Joshua would have dismissed him and told him off in an instant. However, knowing that his friend was having a bad mood, he agreed, "Okay. Where shall we meet?"
"In my apartment. We can sleep after we're drunk and we can continue to drink after waking up!"
"Wait! What? Do you want to drink yourself to an early grave?" While speaking with Sheffield on the phone, Joshua told his colleague that he was leaving and then went to change his clothes.
"Of course not! The world is such a beautiful place. Why would I possibly want to die?" 'Even if I wanted to die, I wouldn't choose to drink myself to death. I would only die from having excessive sex with Evelyn, ' he thought to himself.
"What do you want to eat? I'll bring some food to your place."
"Don't bother. We can just get food delivered to us!"
"Will I be lucky enough to have dinner cooked by Chef Tang?"
"I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I only cook for my woman!"
Joshua cleared his throat and imitated a woman's voice. "Chef Tang, I can be your woman tonight."
"Dude, that's not even funny!" Sheffield got goosebumps from Joshua's words. Then he hung up the phone on Joshua.
Pulling his face away from the phone, Joshua gasped in shock. 'That man doesn't have a romantic bone in his body. How did Evelyn even fall in love with him?' he wondered.
When Sheffield twisted the car keys into ignition, his phone rang again. He assumed it was Joshua and was about to scold him, but when he saw the caller ID, he smiled. Coincidentally, it was another friend of his. "Colonel Li, long time no see. How have you been?"
"Cut the crap! I'm in Y City now!" Gifford had just returned from his mission. His body was covered in mud with weeds sticking out of his mouth. Sitting on a rock and looking at the wasteland in front of him, he felt bored out of his mind.
"What a coincidence! I'm in Y City too," Sheffield said while tapping the steering wheel.
Gifford rolled his eyes and said, "I'm leaving tomorrow morning. That means, you and Joshua are spending the night with me!"
"No problem! I don't even mind sleeping with you!"
"Even after so long, you're still as shameless as ever. I swear if you were standing in front of me, I would have punched you in the face already!"
Sheffield giggled and said, "Come on! Do it!"
"Shut up, you moron!" Gifford hung up the phone while cursing him.
When Joshua heard that Gifford would be joining them, he bought an entire roasted chicken, a roasted rabbit and a roasted duck along the way.
Sheffield looked at the chicken, duck and rabbit on the dinner table in awe and asked, "How long has it been since you last ate meat?" "
It's not for me. I bought them for Gifford. He just came back from a mission, so I'm guessing he hasn't eaten well for at least ten days. I figured it would be the best way to keep him from speaking nonsense!"
"All right! Good idea! I'm not very hungry anyway. But I'm sure even that guy can't eat all of this by himself. If he blames you for wasting money, you'll have to take responsibility!"
Gifford was a soldier, who had cultivated the good habit of diligence and frugality.
"But I'm not hungry either!"
"I don't care!" Sheffield was laughing at Joshua on the inside. "Where's your knife?" Joshua asked.
"What are you doing?"
"I'll chop them up and put half of them in your fridge."
Before Sheffield could answer, the doorbell rang.
"Hey! That was quick!" Sheffield opened the door with a smile. If they hadn't been friends for more than ten years, he wouldn't have recognized the man standing outside the door.
With a look of disgust on his face, Sheffield said, "You couldn't take a shower before coming here?"
Gifford grinned and said, "I know what a neat freak you are, which is why I came here like this to make you sick!"
"Get away from me! Go to take a shower!" Sheffield playfully threw a pair of clean slippers at him.
"Gee, did you just climb out of the cesspool?" asked Joshua, who approached them from the kitchen.
Gifford rolled his eyes at Joshua and answered, "Yes!"
"Damn it. You smell so bad. I think I'm gonna vomit!" Joshua dramatically put his hand over his mouth and coughed, as if he was going to throw up.
Sheffield rolled his eyes and asked in a lukewarm tone, "You look like you've got morning sickness! Joshua, how long have you been pregnant?" He cast an evil glance at Joshua's stomach.
Gifford burst into laughter. Putting his arm around Joshua's shoulder, he said to Sheffield, "He has been pregnant for three months and the father of the baby is me!"
This time, Joshua wanted to throw up for real. "Please, don't ever say that again. I seriously need some new friends. I must be the stupid one for willingly wanting to be friends with you two!" 'I'd rather spend the night with Terilynn. I must work harder and make her my woman, ' Joshua thought.
"You're still a whiny little boy, aren't you?" Gifford loosened his grip on him and took off his mud-stained coat, while enjoying the fun of bickering with his friends.
Sheffield gave Gifford a kick and said, "Get in the shower, right now! Damn it! I have to clean after you."
Gifford threw his dirty clothes on the floor nonchalantly, and walked towards Sheffield's bedroom. This time, however, he was stopped by Sheffield. "Hey, there is a woman in my bedroom now. Why don't you go and take a shower in the guestroom?"
Evelyn was obsessively tidy too. As such, he didn't want Gifford to take a shower in his bedroom. After all, he had reserved it for Evelyn.
"Woman? Call her out!"
"Why would I? Look at yourself. You are naked."
Gifford stood there, hands on his waist, with nothing but black underpants to cover his privates. He lowered his eyes and said, "So what? I have a nice body. I'm not afraid of showing anything. I think you are the one who's afraid that your woman will fall in love with my physique!"
Disgust was written all over Sheffield's face. "You'd better go to the guestroom now, or I'll make you
"I don't care! I can even sleep on the floor." Gifford turned around and went to the room next to Sheffield's bedroom.
"Come on, Gifford. It's true. He really has a girlfriend now. Haven't you noticed that Bailee is gone?" Joshua asked while stretching himself.
"Of course I have." He assumed that Sheffield had sent Bailee to the pet store again.
"His woman is allergic to cats' fur, so to please his woman, he gave Bailee away!"
Gifford popped his head out of the room in surprise and asked, "Really? What does she look like? Is she more beautiful than Bailee?"
Watching Sheffield throwing Gifford's clothes into the washing machine, Joshua smiled and said, "His woman is indeed beautiful! He is totally obsessed with her."
"It's hard to believe that! A playboy like him will never be faithful." Gifford took off his underwear without feeling shy at all.
Joshua, however, rolled his eyes and looked away. "Let me tell you a secret. His woman is my ex-girlfriend. Hahaha..."
"Oh wow! Sounds like the three of you are caught up in a messy situation. It seems that a lot of interesting things have happened during my absence."
"Yes! Now, go take a shower. I'll tell you everything in detail later," said Joshua.
"Is that woman the one whom Sheffield was so attracted to that he stayed in D City for one more week?"
"Yes, that's the one!"
As soon as he got the answer he wanted, Gifford turned around and entered the bathroom.
While Gifford was in the shower, Sheffield scowled at Joshua and said, "Can't you just shut up?"
"Why would I? It feels great to share everything about you with Gifford!"
Sheffield threw the mop to him and said, "Mop the floor!"
"You must be joking! I don't care enough to mop the floor!" Joshua snorted. He should have asked Evelyn to find a cure of his unhealthy obsession with cleanliness.
"You don't want to do it? Don't ask me for help if you have something wrong with your kidneys in the future," Sheffield threatened. A sly grin crept up on his face.
Joshua kicked him in the leg. "My kidneys are in good shape. Thank you. I'm not a playboy. Do you think that everyone is like you? Get out of my way!"
"Whatever! My kidneys are better!" 'Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to make Evelyn happy every night, ' Sheffield mused.