Chapter 739: Value (5)
-Will it be okay with this?
‘It will be okay as it is.’
-Right, you thought well. It’s okay as it is. What can you do, right?
‘…’
-I think leaving it to me would be the best option. That’s why you held my hand, too, right?
‘Right.’
-Then that’s it.
‘But.’
-But? Do you still need something like that? It was not because of my strength that you were defeated but because of your incompetence. Even with that great power, your inability to do anything has caused the situation to come on its own. Am I wrong?
‘…’
-I asked if I’m wrong.
I thought she wasn’t wrong. I actually knew how strong the power she gave me was.
If I hadn’t embraced this force, I wouldn’t be able to bring the situation to this point.
I might not have been able to fight the angels. I wouldn’t have been able to trade blows with Thronus.
-You are weak.
I knew that. If I had been strong, I wouldn’t have accepted the power she gave me.
-Wouldn’t it be possible to call you a failure if we defined a human like you in one word?
That couldn’t be denied either. Kim Hyunsung’s life was close to a failed life.
It wasn’t only in the first round that he lost precious family members and valuable colleagues.
It was the same for the second timeline. I wanted to get stronger, but I couldn’t. I thought I could but couldn’t. I wanted to stand up, but I fell in the end.
Again, I couldn’t save one important person. I couldn’t even reach out to the person who dragged me out of the deep sea. Rather, it was me who harmed him.
I wanted to be comfortable. I was relieved after leaving my burden to him after saying that he wanted to carry my burden together.
It didn’t mean I wasn’t concerned. It didn’t mean I wasn’t nervous either. It wasn’t that I didn’t throw a question mark on myself as to whether he could handle the burden I had left.
However, it seemed that I tried to turn a blind eye to it. I didn’t think about it at the time, but I must’ve ignored it.
I was happy. It was literally because of that kind of selfishness.
The peace of mind that came from having someone who understood me, understood my past and understood my present was no different from drugs.
I knew he was struggling, but I might’ve been pretending not to see the signal he was sending.
Wouldn’t I have given him more burden instead? Wouldn’t I be making him nervous and giving him a hard time?
It wasn’t that I didn’t even know about him. I already knew how he would behave if I left all the burden to him. It was because of me that he lost his memory. Because of me, he was dying, and it was because of me that he was in danger.
I brought it in. I… I brought it in.
Wrong. It was wrong in the first place.
He shouldn’t have offered his hand, and he shouldn’t have told me to do it together. I should’ve passed by him when we met in the tutorial dungeon.
-What if I turn back the time? Do you think it’s better to pretend you don’t know then?
‘…’
-Oh, right. I shouldn’t have asked that. You’re trash without the courage to go back again. Coward. You might think you’re a little different from who you were back then, but you’re not. Human nature does not change. Kim Hyunsung, who ran away from being scared in the tutorial dungeon, that’s your ugly essence. You will keep running away. You know that’s where comfort lies, after all.
‘…’
-You know that’s how you can feel less pain. I am not insulating that you are making the wrong choice right now. Rather, you made a reasonable choice. I’m just telling you that there is a very ugly and lowly feeling hidden in that rational judgment. Do you get what I mean?
‘…’
-You will keep running. Endlessly. You’ll keep escaping from your sins nonstop. In a mean, dirty and ugly way.
‘…’
-But don’t worry too much. No matter how poor of a human you are, I am looking after you, right? I like your dirty side, your twisted ide.
‘…’
-Go back again. This time, things will be really over.
‘…’
In an instant, the vision in front of me began to change. For a moment, a feeling of rejection soared throughout my body.
Of course. That was a natural reaction. What I was seeing right at that moment was something created, after all.
Hadn’t I experienced it in the unconscious world? I knew I had to get out of this place.
However, in the end, I smiled.
I knew that everything was a lie, but the appearance of the people reflected by the sunset made me lose the will to resist the fake scene.
-You know you’re not helpful anyway, don’t you? You are the perfect example of a failed human. You inevitably ruin things and cause pain around you. You’re a human designed that way.
‘…’
-I’m telling you that sometimes doing nothing will be more helpful.
Maybe so.
-I’m right.
Right. She was right.
“What are you looking at, Guild Master?”
When I woke up, everything would be over. Kim Hyunsung was a person who had already failed and a person who would fail anyway.
I knew that I shouldn’t speak, but I did. I nodded over and over at the small whisper, continuing to sink again and again.
“Here…”
“Yes?”
“Aren’t you the Guild Master here? You can talk to me comfortably, Hyejin.”
“Ah… right, because this is the Earth. That’s a little fun to think about. A Guild Master in a place like this. I get embarrassed to think that anyone could’ve heard it.”
“At best, they’ll think we’re the people you’ve met in online gaming clubs. By the way… who hasn’t arrived yet?”
“Oh, hyung-nim is a little late. They said he’s busy these days, and he really does seem extremely busy. Well, it looks like he’s barely making time again. The more I think about him, the more hyung-nim sounds greater.”
“Vice Guild Master is already an amazing person.”
‘Oh, Hee-young, you think I don’t know? I wanted to say that he was already great, but he’s even greater than that. As soon as he got back to Earth, he suddenly said that he would try to be a lawyer, and then he really became one. And I heard that although he just got a job at a law firm, he is already in a high position.’
He was indeed a great person.
“At this rate, I wonder if he’s going to enter politics or something. In just 20 years, maybe ten years, what if he becomes a member of the National Assembly and later becomes president?”
“I don’t really think it will be that way, but… I think it will suit him very well.”
“It’s a shame that things aren’t going well with Hayan these days since he’s that busy, but… well, their relationship isn’t an ordinary one. It wouldn’t be strange if I hear that they’re getting married within a few years. Junior Sora knows that better, don’t you? The two of them now…”
“Yeah… Jung Hayan is… is doing well. Yeah… she’s having her meals well.”
“Well, that’s fortunate, but… Come to think of it, Sora, right now, at hyung-nim’s company… you’re the law firm secretary or something, right?”
“Yes. Thanks to him, I’m doing well. Except that he’s too busy… actually, today is also a busy day for us, so I should’ve been there, but… he was considerate and told me that I could go home first.”
“With that Chinese lawyer…”
“I can’t explain in detail… he’s in charge of something. He’s really busy with that.”
As I slowly looked around, familiar faces were reflected in my view: the guild members and colleagues who were with me on the continent.
I thought it’s been a long time since we’d been gathered in one place like that. My heart was filled with an indescribable sense of satisfaction.
I knew it could never be done, but I smiled even though I knew that I couldn’t go back to Earth. Such scenery wouldn’t be bad either.
After everything was over, there would be a lot of gatherings like that.
“It’s not only hyung-nim that’s great. Hyejin is also amazing. She also passed the exam, so now the only thing left is to become a prosecutor.”
“I am… just in the beginning. I’m far behind.”
“When I first came back to Earth, I was dumbfounded, but seeing each one settling down like this makes me amazed, and it’s refreshing. Ye-ri is also attending college, and Ahn Ki-mo has become a successful actor. His movie is even about to be released now. Something like Ahn Bokdong, the king of cars… Hee-young was also busy wandering here and there because of her volunteer work… Elena became a streamer out of nowhere…”
I could see Kim Ye-ri, who had a bright face, opening her mouth.
“4.5 million subscribers. She’s also famous abroad.”
“Is she really that famous, Kim Ye-ri?”
“Yeah. Really famous. I think she’s more famous than most celebrities. Her video of eating Nuclear Fire Noodles has 25 million views… Look at this.”
“Incredible. Really… I was worried about her coming to an unfamiliar place and adapting accordingly… Rather, she adapted better than me.”
“Junior Ah-young is also working well in the workshop. There’s nothing to be worried about. I’m more worried about our Guild Master hyung-ssi. Is Hyunsung studying hard?”
“Yes. Deokgu. Honestly, I’m not sure what I’m doing, but… I’m doing it.”
“Actually, I thought you would settle down soon, but surprisingly…”
“Yeah. It’s slow. It seems that I have not yet adapted well to life on Earth. But it feels great to see other people doing so well. Yes. I’m really happy.”
I might not be able to adapt properly, but everyone could live a happy life if we went back to Earth. No, I was sure of it. Everyone would be shining like new.
“You will settle down well. I’m certain of that. Hyung-nim was really concerned about you too.”
“Is that so?”
“I haven’t heard the details, but he said it was bothering him. Oh, it looks like he’s coming in now. Ask him directly.”
As I naturally looked away, the two people entering the room were reflected in my view. I watched them slowly laughing and walking.
“Here! Hyung-nim! Hayan!”
“Deokgu.”
“Vice Guild Master, It’s been a while.”
“Yeah. It’s been a long time, everyone.”
“Is Hayan doing well?”
“I-I-It’s been a long time, everyone…”
“Yeah.”
“It’s been a long time. Hyunsung too.”
“Ah, yes, Kiyoung.”
“I’m sorry that it’s been so long since I last saw you.”
“No. I know you’re busy. I couldn’t respond to the call because I might be a nuisance. Actually, even today… I’m worried that you’re here when you shouldn’t be.”
“It’s fine, Hyunsung. Life on Earth is, of course, important, but it’s not as important as memories on the continent. If you allow it, I will come to see you more often from now on. I’m not that far from here, but when I think about it, I think I acted too indifferent.”
“That’s…”
“Then, I’ll consider that as my permission.”
“No, it’s fine…”
“After this work, I’ll have more time, so it’s really okay. Oh! I made you stand up for too long. Hayan, let’s sit down.”
“…”
“How… How are you doing?”
A face with a smile, as usual, was visible.
“Yeah… I was…”
“How are you doing?”
She wore an expression that seemed to have no worries.
“I am…”
“Are… you doing well?”
“I…”
“Yes?”
“I don’t… think I am.”