Chapter 921. Sera (21)
“What? W-What do you mean?” Jung Ha-Yan asked.
'Look at me.'
“I-I don’t understand... w-what you’re saying. M-My magic...” Jung Ha-Yan paused.
'Look. At. Me.'
“I-I never lost it... he...hehe,” Jung Ha-Yan said, chuckling.
I knew she was going to play innocent.
“Hehe... he...”
Jung Ha-Yan tried to improve the atmosphere by laughing, but her laugh sounded awkward in my ears. I wasn’t sure whether she thought I was joking or she laughed to avoid this situation, but her body was speaking louder than her mouth at the moment.
“N-n-nothing happened to me. No way. B-But... I’m not feeling well right now,” Jung Ha-Yan stuttered.
'You’re always feeling unwell.'
“I never lost my magic. That never happened. I-I think there’s been a misunderstanding... Ah... maybe you thought that... because I’m not in the best condition,” Jung Ha-Yan continued.
‘This is going to take all day.’
It seemed that she had decided to feign ignorance.
Jung Ha-Yan seemed to have thought that she needed to make eye contact with me because she was trying her best to look at me. She was trying her best to find a reasonable excuse, as she knew more about magic than me.
Jung Ha-Yan refused to back out of her stance, even though I had already confronted her.
I was sure she'd try to change the subject by saying that she was in pain or her stomach was hurting; she could also say that she wanted another cup of tea, and she could even make awkward jokes.
Honestly, I was convinced that she had no idea what she was saying right now.
I was sure her head had gone blank—blank as an empty sheet of sheet.
“B-But... Well... B-Back then, Sora...”
'Let’s say her name again.'
“Ha-Yan.”
'Stop avoiding it.'
“I’m saying it because I’m worried about you. You think I wouldn’t know?” I questioned.
“W-What?”
I was certain that Ha-Yan knew that I was aware of her condition, as she was one of the few people who knew me the most. She knew what kind of person I was, so I was hoping that she wasn't thinking that I wouldn't know her true condition.
'You really think that you can fool me? You didn't think that way, did you?'
I cast a cold gaze at Jung Ha-Yan, and she cowered. She looked like she was thinking hard about what she was supposed to do.
She seemed to have realized that I was no longer the same Lee Ki-Young that she was familiar with, and her face became even paler at the realization.
It was then that she realized that the situation had gotten much more serious. I was kind of worried about how I looked in her eyes right now... Actually, she seemed scared of me, just like in her past life.
Jung Ha-Yan hadn't noticed that she was breathing in ragged pants. She also hadn't noticed the beaded cold sweat on her forehead and the fact that her eyes were quivering ever so slightly.
Soon, tears started falling down her cheeks.
‘This won’t do.’
I had to be nicer to her.
“We shouldn’t hide anything from each other,” I told her.
“What? Ah...”
“I thought we were going to share our secrets with each other,” I reminded her.
“...”
“I’m not scolding you. I just want to know why you’re trying to hide this and why you didn’t tell me earlier. I want to talk like we normally do... Why did you hide it from me?” I asked.
'Yeah, I just want to talk.'
“Ah... w-well...” Jung Ha-Yan stuttered.
“You should’ve told me first the moment this happened... I want to know everything, Ha-Yan,” I told her.
“...”
“I want to know everything about you,” I said.
“I-I see...” Jung Ha-Yan said.
Since we had changed drastically compared to when we first met, it’d be more effective to talk to her like this rather than be straightforward about it. It seemed like she somewhat agreed with my words, but I wasn't sure whether she had acknowledged it herself or not.
Honesty was probably really effective in situations like this.
I wanted her to know that I cherished her regardless of her level of competence.
‘This is harder than convincing Kim Hyun-Sung to confess that he was a regressor.’
“We’ve known each other for a long time, and we promised to spend our future together...” I said.
'I like you more than you think.'
“I don’t think there’s anything more important than trust in our relationship,” I added.
It seemed kind of one-sided, but trust was important.
“Right... t-trust... is important. Y-You’re right,” Jung Ha-Yan stuttered.
“The most important thing is that we don’t lie to each other,” I said.
“Right... I shouldn’t lie...” Jung Ha-Yan mumbled.
'I’ve fallen for you harder than you think. You really thought I would dislike you because of that stupid magic? You’re smarter and more charming than you think. My feelings for you have to do with your magic.'
I touched her cheeks, and she relaxed gradually. I could tell that she was no longer feeling as nervous as earlier. I kissed her cheek, and she trembled. Then, I moved closer to her and asked, “Can you tell me honestly?”
“Y-Yes... I-I’ll tell you,” Jung Ha-Yan replied.
Jung Ha-Yan spoke as if she were possessed. Of course, she was nervous because this was a big deal to her.
I was certain that it wasn’t easy for her to confess the fact that she had lost everything, and it was all because she thought that her magic was what made her valuable.
I would have the same thoughts as her if I were in her shoes.
How could I tell people that I had suddenly lost everything one day?
It was like telling Kim Hyun-Sung that I had lost the Regressor Instruction Manual or telling my believers that I had lost my holy power.
It wasn’t easy, and I completely understood what Jung Ha-Yan was feeling. She was scared and frightened. She definitely didn’t want to do this; she was particularly scared right now, as magic was everything to her.
Jung Ha-Yan took a deep breath and said, “A-A few days ago... I-I suddenly—heuk!”
“...”
“I-I-I don’t know why... but... I-I couldn’t use my mana... I-I-It all disappeared... Hiccup... Kgh...” Jung Ha-Yan confessed.
The way she was trying to read my reaction while talking was pretty cute in my eyes.
“I kept trying... b-b-but... Kgh...” Jung Ha-Yan stuttered.
“Really?”
“I-I-I’m... sorry... Hiccup... Kgh...” Jung Ha-Yan cried.
'You don't have to apologize to me.'
“Why are you apologizing? Is there anything wrong with your body?” I asked.
“Huh? I’m fine...” Jung Ha-Yan answered.
“What about your health?” I asked.
It was only natural for me to ask about her health before asking her more about how exactly she had ended up losing her magic. It was a touching way to go about the matter as well.
“Wouldn’t it be good to have... Miss Hee-Young or Miss Elena examine you?” I suggested.
“What?” Jung Ha-Yan said, sounding dumbfounded.
Of course, she was dumbfounded. The situation was going in a completely different way than she had expected, so she was finding it hard to adjust to it.
Had she expected me to act coldly or do something dramatic to her?
She was probably worried that I was going to tell her that I no longer needed her.
The possibility that she thought of me as some kind of a typical jerk protagonist made me feel kind of sad, but I was reborn as an exceedingly kind person. I was kind of cold at the beginning, but it happened a long time ago, and I had no choice but to be cold at the time as well.
'So you misunderstood me, is that right?'
“Why didn’t you say anything?” I asked.
“Ah... well... you see...”
‘You didn’t know this was going to happen, right?’
I held her hand and stared at her with a worried gaze.
“Is it because of me?” I questioned.
I reflected on myself and thought that perhaps I had burdened her a bit too much.
This was possible because it was Jung Ha-Yan. If it happened to an ordinary mage, I was sure they'd abandon their tasks. Jung Ha-Yan managed to install warp gates throughout the continent and take care of the necessary steps that only a mage could do.
“I-I-It’s not because of you,” she answered.
'It is because of me.'
“I-I don’t... really know the reason... b-but it’s not because of you. I-I think this is just temporary... I-I feel okay, though. S-Sora examined me... Y-You don’t have to worry,” Jung Ha-Yan reassured me.
“...”
“A-Actually... I-I’m feeling kind of sick. M-My head... and m-my chest hurts...” Jung Ha-Yan said.
‘I knew it.’
“I-I’m feeling kind of dizzy as well... Yes, I-I feel dizzy. I think I’m sick,” Jung Ha-Yan added.
“It would have been great if you had told me sooner,” I said.
It was really simple.
‘She must realize it.’
Jung Ha-Yan knew that it didn’t matter whether she had magic or skills and that all of it was just a misunderstanding. She was telling herself that it couldn’t be it. Of course, she was still doubtful, but she was starting to relax.
It was clear that she was feeling extremely relieved, and she was even...
‘She's even smiling.’
“He... hehe... hehehe...”
She was in a really good mood.
“Hehe... Heuk... Hiccup... Hehehe...”
'Why are you crying?'
“Heuk... heuk... heuk...”
'This is kind of scary.'
“He... hehehehe...”
Stop...
Her strange laugh was probably part of the process of her realizing that she was wrong.
However, it seemed that she hadn't noticed that I was casting a nervous gaze at her.
‘At least I managed to change her mind.’
Jung Ha-Yan chuckled like a madwoman, and she looked like I was telling her that I loved her. She was wrong when she thought that I would abandon her just because she had lost her magic and that she'd only get a reward by showing results.
I assumed she came up with that conclusion, as she was under a ton of stress recently, and I understood why she was struggling to accept that her mindset was wrong all this while.
Jung Ha-Yan's values and mindset had changed upon her arrival here, so it could be said that the reason behind her struggle was the fact that she was trying to recover the self-esteem that she had lost a long time ago.
“Pfft... hehehe... Hiccup... Hehe...”
“...”
“Hehe... hehehehe—Ah.” Jung Ha-Yan suddenly stopped laughing. I knew what she was thinking, and the next word that she muttered told me that my assumption was correct.
“Sera."