Chapter 925. Gen (4)
“What are you thinking about, Father Lee Ki-Young?” a priest asked.
“It’s nothing,” I[1] answered.
“Thank you... for today. Father Jernihan will be arriving soon,” the priest informed me.
“Thank you,” I said.
I had no choice but to be determined because that was my role. I had long gotten used to hiding my true self and pushing aside my true desires, as I was the saint chosen by the light. As an honorary bishop, I would never cry, no matter how painful or sad I was.
I was going to accept my holy role with joy and honor.
I woke up at the usual time, prayed, and finished my personal schedule.
I completed my boring and repetitive tasks every day.
‘I need to be persistent.’
I had things I wanted to do and see, but as the honorary cardinal, I had no choice but to hide my desires because that was what the world wanted me to do, and that was what... Goddess Benigoa wanted from me.
My fate was to stay clean and live my life for others.
‘I want to travel.’
I wanted to go on an adventure.
I wanted to see interesting and mysterious things and live with ordinary people.
I also wanted to know what it felt like to be the real me. The blue sky was vast, but I couldn’t go anywhere.
I had wings that allowed me to fly into the vast sky, but I couldn’t spread my wings. I knew I wasn’t allowed to do that, and I had long gotten used to sacrificing myself. Living for the things I loved more than myself was a beautiful and happy thing.
However, I'd sometimes look at the sky with an empty gaze.
“Traveling...” I mumbled.
- Don’t be ridiculous. You don’t like traveling, oppa.
‘Why did you have to ruin the mood?’
- You know that suddenly acting like that isn't convincing, you know that, right? You hate adventures and expeditions, after all. You don’t like sleeping outside because it hurts your back, and you don’t like marching because it hurts your legs and shoulders...
- Have you ever carried your own backpack? You always made that pig carry it for you... The only thing you know how to do is destroy a campfire. You probably don’t even know how to set up camp.
- That’s not true.
- Actually, there is a type of travel you'd like. A safe and luxurious one. The camp has to be a place that never gets dirty, and there has to be someone who will carry you whenever you’re feeling a bit tired.
- It sounds strange to hear that you want to travel and go on adventures when you're much more of a clean freak than me. You only started walking a few kilometers every day after learning about Jung Ha-Yan’s warp gates.
- Can you leave me alone so I can focus?
- It’s because you’re being a real eyesore. I can’t believe there’s an idiot who believes you.
“...”
- I thought you were working on something ridiculous...
- That’s why I need to focus, and it actually sounds convincing, you know? Also, think about it, noona. Do you know how much I've struggled at the time just to survive? I even went on dungeon expeditions back then. Anyway, this coin is going to make us rich.
Basically, the small child inside the Saint of Light wanted to see the world.
‘I do have records of working as an adventurer before entering the Vatican and being chosen by Goddess.’
With my realistic acting, my story would sound pretty convincing.
- I would look into the distance or stare out into space with an empty gaze... I’ve been doing this more often, as I’ve been seeing him every day recently. His reaction is much better than I thought.
- Yeah, I’m sure it is.
- Our conversation was awkward at first, but at some point, he started having more fun than me. He'd show me documents and describe things to me passionately. He makes me feel like I’ve been to those places.
- ...
- He's kind of stupid, but he’s passionate. He’s really determined.
- And that could be all he has to offer. There’s no guarantee that Templar Gen will take you out from here. To him, that would be like disobeying Benigoa.
- It’s only difficult in the beginning, and thinking of it as an act of disobeying Benigoa is an overinterpretation. We just need to start with simple conversations, and it’s important to take it slow from there until it eventually becomes a tada! moment.
- Are you sure?
- If things go according to plan, I’ll be leaving the Vatican today.
- Well, I hope your plan works out. Ah! I need to head out and spread more rumors. How are things over there?
- It’s chaotic.
- Not bad.
With that, the call ended.
Since Ji-Hye noona was doing her job, I needed to start doing mine.
As soon as I knocked on the table, I saw a familiar figure.
“Father Lee Ki-Young.”
“It’s been a while, Father Jernihan,” I greeted.
He was neither on Basel nor Father Yohan’s side.
He was a stubborn priest serving the honorary cardinal with sincerity.
“I heard... you requested to go out,” Father Jernihan mentioned.
“That’s right,” I said.
“May... I ask why?” he asked.
There was no need to be nervous. I just need to explain what I needed.
“As you already know... there’s a plague outbreak,” I said.
It was really coincidental, and I mean really coincidental. As always, I took an interest in the outbreak.
“I heard the priests are currently dispatched to the affected regions, so I'm thinking that Imight be able to help them, Father Jernihan,” I responded.
“...”
“...”
“I’m sorry, Father Lee Ki-Young. The Vatican is doing everything within its power to calm the situation down. It’s not as serious as you think... so you don’t need to worry about that. Right now, your safety is the top priority...” Father Jernihan said.
“But Father Jernihan...”
“I understand how you feel, Father Lee Ki-Young. However, it hasn’t been a week since the assassination attempt. The Vatican is doing its best to investigate the situation internally... but we haven’t figured it out yet. Going outside at a time like this—”
“But the people are in pain, Father Jernihan,” I interrupted him.
“The Vatican sent priests to provide support to them, Father Lee Ki-Young. They’re doing their best to get the plague under control... so you...”
“Father Jernihan. Don’t think you can fool me. You know you can’t get this plague under control that easily. I’ll—no, if the Vatican won’t allow it, then I’ll go with the Blue Guild. Please take me to Father Basel. I’ll tell him myself and go,” I ordered.
“The Blue Guild has already agreed to this. The guild and the Order of Benigoa are working while considering your safety as the top priority. If you really want to leave, I’ll push for it, but you must think about the realistic problems you must bear, Father Lee Ki-Young,” Father Jernihan warned.
'That’s what I’m talking about. That’s the answer I wanted to hear.'
“We consider your safety as our top priority, so we’ll have no choice but to dispatch guards with you. Many Holy Knights, Heretic Inquisitors, and guardian priests will be moving with you,” Father Jernihan informed.
Obviously, they weren’t going to come with me because it wasn’t realistic. Not only would it cost a ton of money to dispatch them, but it’d take them a long time to prepare.
Since they'd be moving in the name of the Vatican, they would also have to focus on my safety, and there would obviously be limitations to that.
They’d have to search the sick patients and be wary of the people nearby.
This wasn’t something that could be done through willpower alone.
Normally, things weren't as exaggerated as this, but I was getting a lot of attention after the assassination attempt, so it was probably impossible for me to go out there. A crowd would surround the guards, and they'd have to be wary of ambushes.
In other words, I would be a nuisance by visiting the regions affected by a plague.
Father Jernihan didn’t say that, but he clearly wanted me to read between the lines.
“You’re saying that... I might be a nuisance,” I said.
'I’m sad.'
“I-It’s... nothing like that, Father Lee Ki-Young. Why would you say such a thing? I was s-simply... telling you about the potential issues,” Father Jernihan denied.
I couldn’t help but feel sad. How could something so sad happen to me?
“I’ll do my best to come up with a way as soon as possible. I—”
“I completely understand what you’re saying, Father Jernihan. I-It... looks like I made a troublesome request,” I interrupted him.
When it came to method acting, one had to regulate one's emotions on a regular basis, so I forced myself to smile. I did this to show that I understood and accepted what Father Jernihan was trying to say.
“Don’t worry about what I said, Father Jernihan,” I told him.
“F-Father Lee Ki-Young,” Father Jernihan stuttered.
‘No, don’t fall for it and just leave.’
“Whoo...”
‘No, just leave.’
Thankfully, he bit his lips and bowed. He stood with determination as if telling me that there wasn't any room for negotiations, and I liked that determined side of his.
Obviously, I released a heavy sigh.
I was an incompetent saint. Everyone praised me, saying I was the Son of Light, but I realized that I was just a weak human being deep inside.
‘Everything is my fault.’
Sadness filled me, and then I heard a voice outside.
“Father Lee Ki-Young.”
“...”
“Father Lee Ki-Young?”
“Please tell him I don’t want to see him today,” I instructed.
“...”
“Actually, tell him I’m kind of tired today... Sniff!” I cried.
“Tell Templar Gen that I’m sorry...” I added.
“I’ll deliver your message,” the priest answered.
Father Lee Ki-Young would never cry... but there were times when I'd cry whenever I was alone.
'Ah, is there anyone who can heal my wound? My wound is only going to get worse if I don’t do anything about it.'
‘Is he going to leave me alone?’
I was sure the rumors had already spread, and it was possible that he was spying on me, but was he really not going to do anything about it?
I knew there was something he wanted from me.
'I'm at my lowest point right now, so how about you give it a shot?'
I was sure they had ordered them to do something against his will.
'You won’t get a chance like this again.'
I looked at the sky with an empty gaze. Then, I started crying. Moments later, I sighed deeply and wiped away my tears.
I put on my sad face again and stared at the sky with listless eyes.
And that was when I heard knocking on the window...
“I’m sorry for visiting like you this,” Gen said.
“Mister...” I paused. “Gen?”
I had to show him that I was surprised.
“How about we go for a walk?” Gen suggested.
I instantly saw through his intentions.
‘You’re about to become a criminal, man. Those capable of stealing an egg can steal an ox.’
As expected, it was always easy at first.
1. Lee Ki-Young’s POV ☜