My heart hammering in my chest at being around him again, but I won’t put myself through his kind of
hell anymore. I don’t get very far when that cruel grip latches on to my arm, and I am swung against a
wall out of the way. Heart sinking that he can never just leave me alone, even when he is the one
telling me to get out of his life. He’s relentless, like a goddamn dog after a bone, and for someone who
wanted me gone he isn’t doing a good job of letting me go.
‘‘I’ll be there in a few minutes, this is an employee who should be elsewhere right now.’’ He smiles to
the group I now see are with him, and realise this is a dinner outing of more than just him and needy
over there. A few sets of upper class eyes and a sparkling formal dress glint my way before they are
ushered off by more black suits.
Alexi is left gripping me harshly, all smooth, smile and charm until they are out of sight. It drops the
second we are left alone, and even the concierge had the sense to walk off with a dubious look our
way. I feel my sanity go with her, so deflated and exhausted and I sniff, coughing into my hand as
another wave of dry convulsions that make me wretch hits me.
My throat burns with the effort and I wish I had the sense to just ask for a glass of water at least. Alexi
turns back on me coldly after watching his party depart, confident they are out of sight and earshot.
‘’You were told to stay put, what the hell are you doing here?’’ Same usual hateful tone and deflation
just consumes me. I can’t take this on top of everything else that this man throws at me, and I slap his
hand off me angrily, sick to death of him and finding my last ounce of energy to bark right back.
‘’Fuck off. You don’t control me anymore, it’s not like any threat of punishment means anything either.
I’d happily let you snap my fucking neck the way I am feeling.’’ I turn on my heel to head towards the
awful elements once again and get yanked back by the back of my jacket abruptly, and pulled into a
little outer apex of hallway that is shielded from the inner restaurant, by my hood. I struggle and twist to
yank it free, but he has me dangling like a bratty child.
‘’I’m in no fucking mood. You were told to stay put and call Mico if you needed anything; you’re soaked
through, look like hell and in a place you shouldn’t be.’’ He rasps at me, losing his famous cool ever so
quickly.
‘’I’m sorry, did I embarrass you while out with your girlfriend? Does Joanne know she’s not your one
and only?’’ I droll hatefully, silky sweet venom rolling off my tongue. He just looks like he really will
strangle me this time, but I no longer care, sickness has a way of making everything around you
unimportant and blurred out because all you can focus on is how close to death you feel.
I was never good at being sick. I have a shitty reaction to all kinds of bugs and illnesses, and when I
get them they all go the same way, horrid all-consuming fever and sweats when they hit their peak and
I can feel that’s where I am heading. Alexi just glares at me.
‘’You really never know when to just shut up, do you?’’ Alexi snaps at me and this time I am roughly
grabbed by the top shoulder of my jacket as he marches me outside, not even asking me to walk with
him. Not that I would go willingly.
My head swims and I stumble with dizziness for a second, which only gets me lifted by my clothes,
manhandled aggressively. I am half dragged, half pushed out into the street as one of his familiar
security come rushing with an umbrella to shield Lord Carrero from the rain.
Alexi just keeps throwing me forward at speed until I’m ushered to a car, which he opens and
practically tosses me inside. I don’t even fight or react, there is nothing left of me to do so and I just
want to lie down. My head's circling, brain throbbing and vision blotching. I’m close to passing out and I
need to be alone to get over this. I move over to get away from him when I hit the leather seat,
expecting him to shut the door and scramble to the other side, surprised when he follows me in.
What the hell?
I don’t even care; I gave up trying to work out why this man ever does anything he does anymore. I just
make sure there is enough distance that he will stop touching me now he has me locked in here with
him. I think of getting out the other side but one look at the heavens raining down out there and how
shitty I feel, I just sink back and rest my head back on the rest behind my skull to give myself a few
seconds respite.
‘’Go tell my date and my party I’ll be back, I have been temporarily called away for a moment.’’ He
orders the driver who immediately dives out of the car and heads to the man with the brolly. I guess it’s
a game of Chinese whispers and he’s back in a fraction of the time.
Alexi is smoothing the rain from his coat and just turns to me. I, on the other hand, am far beyond being
able to wipe water off, and I am already shivering from the effects. My body feels volcanic and yet I’m
trembling involuntarily now I am off my jelly legs.
I don’t have any fight in me and I just sink lower into the padded seat and let my throbbing head take
over.
‘‘Pharmacy, then apartment … Now, what’s wrong with you? What do you need?’’ Alexi is back in
unemotional mode and I wonder if this is because he doesn’t trust me to go home and stay out of his
way; he’s going to deposit me and probably shackle me to his apartment, just for the hell of it.
‘’A morgue maybe, I think I’m dying from Alexi related diseases.’’ I answer sarcastically. Lifting my
head, I look his way warily and earn myself another furrowed brow of disdain. He looks like he always
does, except in a tux and annoyingly groomed. No hints of what’s going on in that brain on the surface.
‘’Hardly. I make sure I’m clean on a regular basis. You’re sick; what is it? Flu?’’ He hasn’t got a suave
bedside manner, despite probably making a hot doctor and I just shrug at him.
There goes my idea he’s riddled me with sex diseases then.
‘‘If you’re lucky maybe it’s the plague.’’ Would probably be a blessing for him if I died of a horrible
disease suddenly. I jump when he puts a hand on my forehead and slap him away again impulsively,
burning from his touch and the ignition of fury. I am surprised by that gesture but nothing should
surprise me where he is concerned anymore. Alexi does shit for God knows what reason, and I will
have an aneurysm if I even begin to dig at the layers and depths of how his mind works.
‘‘You have a fever, you’re hot and unwell and you should be in bed.’’
‘’No shit, you know I happen to feel it and I don’t need your powers of psychic to tell me I’m running a
temperature. I weirdly did manage to summarise that I might be sick all on my own.’’ I lose all strength
in my voice, giving up physically and sink back down again, lowering my chin when the car starts
moving. I may want to spit and scratch at him but my body is reminding me that I am in no fit state at
all. I am barely holding on, I just want to go back to bed and a million miles away from him.
Alexi tells the driver to find a Duane Reade and turns back to me with a concerned look that spikes my
mistrust and anxiety about this man.
‘’Why are you being nice to me?’’ I turn to him with a look of suspicion. Alexi only does what helps
Alexi, and he’s not known for gallantry or compassion, especially when it comes to me. After how
things ended, this is the last thing I expected from him at all.
He just ignores me and pulls out his phone to answer the vibration it's making. I leave him to it and turn
my head to the window to watch the rain lash down on us while we move through the streets. New York
is a city full of interesting sights and this part of it is both strangely and architecturally pretty yet
intimidating all the same. People rushing about under umbrellas and cars whizzing past in the busy
streets, despite the horrendous weather.
‘’Do you have water and food in the apartment, has Mico been checking in?’’ It’s said softly, so much
so, that at first, I don’t even think he’s talking to me and jump when he touches me. Flinching and
moving away pathetically, afraid of any contact from him at all.
‘’I’m not hungry and it hurts to swallow, I just need some pills and a bed. I’ll sleep it off and sweat it out.
I’m a big girl … I don’t need anyone to take care of me or check in, I never did.’’ This time I don’t look at
him, I just continue watching the rain and impulsively trail my finger down the glass to follow a huge
drop which moves so slowly it seems suspended in time. Focused on the small things to try and block
him out. I draw a tiny circle around where it hits the outer rubber of the window and then go back up
midway to trace a new fat drop as it makes the same repetitive path.
Alexi taps his thumb on his leg and remains silent.
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