Chapter 124 - I’m Sorry, But Who Are You?
Translated by Eve
Edited by Serefina
11. I’m Sorry, But Who Are You?
【444：Host dada, what are you going to do now? (⊙v⊙)】
【Xie He：What’s the situation like outside? 】
【444：More than a month has already passed. Right now, everyone outside thinks that you’ve already died. They all came to this city to look for you but they couldn’t find you no matter what they did~】
【Xie He：It’s time to give my cute first love a chance. Smile.JPG】
【444：(⊙o⊙) Oh!】
【Xie He：Baby, help me look up Lu Jianing’s location. When he arrives, let me know.】
The day Lu Jianing had received news that Xie He had been in a car accident, he had rushed over, but hadn’t been able to find the other.
As each day passed, everyone all began to say that Xie He was already dead. But Lu Jianing couldn’t believe it. Why did this suddenly happen?
It was the first time Lu Jianing had felt so helpless. He hadn’t been able to stop Xie He from selling his company, he hadn’t been able to help him, and now, he didn’t even know if the other was even alive….
After nearly two months, Lu Jianing once again came to the city near the river. He still held a faint hope that Xie He had been saved by someone…that he was somewhere here….
Lu Jianing slowly strolled down the street by the river…. He had never expected that he would have to say goodbye to the other so quickly like this.
He loved the other so much, but right now, he didn’t even have a chance to catch even one last glance of him….
The sky gradually darkened. Lu Jianing was about to go back when suddenly, a man traversed the crowd in front of him. That person’s profile was exactly the same as Xie He’s. It was so familiar that even within the big crowd, he was able to recognize him at a glance. Lu Jianing’s heart began to beat furiously. He began to run, chasing after that person. However, there were too many people. By the time he made it over there, that person had already disappeared!
Was that Xie He or not? Had he really been saved by someone? But if he was alive, why hadn’t he contacted anyone? Why didn’t he go back?
Lu Jianing’s mind was in disorder. He carefully recalled what he had just seen and began to doubt himself. He wondered if he had been mistaken because he longed for the other man too much. However, he couldn’t let go of even the thinnest sliver of hope. Lu Jianing had his subordinates issue a missing person’s notice. He questioned every passerby on this street. Just as he was about to lose all hope, he finally received news. It was said that Old Man Zhang, who collected junk from the river bank, had picked up a man a few days ago. That man looked very similar to the person in the photo of the notice.
Lu Jianing thanked the person who told him and rushed over to the address he was given.
It was an extremely dilapidated little house. It was said that an old man lived here. This old man relied on collecting and selling junk to send his only granddaughter to school. One day, he saw that a person was being carried down by the river rapids and went to save him. That person wasn’t very badly injured, but because he had suffered head trauma, he had lost his memories. When Old Man Zhang saw that this person had nowhere to go, he took him in.
This was the information Lu Jianing had received. He stood before this cramped wooden house and paced back and forth fretfully. Would he once again only be getting his hopes up?
When the sun was about to set, Lu Jianing saw two people—one tall and one short— slowly approach the house.
The tall man wore cheap, coarse clothing. He wore a pair of cloth shoes. Despite this, there was no way of covering his brilliance. His elegant face had on a gentle smile and he held a bag in his band. The short person was a sloppy-looking old man. The old man carried a snakeskin bag full of rubbish on his back. The two of them chatted and laughed. The light of the setting sun illuminated their figures, casting a very warm glow.
Lu Jianing looked at the tall man and his eyes suddenly turned red.
This was the person he loved. He was still alive.
Xie He was on his way back to his and Old Man Zhang’s home, vegetables in his hand as he chatted and laughed with the other, when he saw a man standing at the entrance to the house. He didn’t know why, but he could tell that although the man’s attire was low-key, it must have cost a lot. Why did someone like this come here? He lowered his head and said to Old Man Zhang, “Is he here for you?”
Old Man Zhang shook his head. “I don’t know him.”
Xie He smiled at Lu Jianing and asked, “Excuse me, who are you?”
Lu Jianing looked at the way Xie He was greeting him with a smile. He was so vivid and lively like this…. He then recalled the despair he had felt when he thought Xie He was dead. Intense joy and the feeling of getting back what he had once lost made him unable to control his emotions. Something was dripping down from the corners of his eyes.
When Xie He saw this, he felt very helpless. Why did this steady-looking man suddenly break out in tears? He hesitated and then asked with concern, “Are you okay? How about you come in and sit for a….”
Before he could finish his sentence, he was suddenly hugged tightly by this man!
Lu Jianing hugged Xie He tightly. When he felt the warmth of the person in his arms, his empty heart felt like it was filled in an instant. He was choked with emotion. “I finally found you.”
I finally found you. Thank god I found you.
This time, I won’t lose you again.
Being hugged like this, Xie He said awkwardly, “Are you my friend? I’m sorry. I forgot everything. Can…you first let go and talk to me?”
Lu Jianing gave Xie He a meaningful look and suddenly said, “I’m not your friend.”
Xie He paused. He was extremely surprised. “Then who are you?”
Lu Jianing said, “I’m your lover.”
Xie He: “….”
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&#k3010;444&#kUU1J;&#k2026;&#k2026;&#k3011;
When Old Man Zhang saw this, he coughed. “Then that’s good. My place is small so I won’t be able to invite you to stay for dinner. Since your family has come looking for you, leave with him, ba.”
Xie He struggled out of Lu Jianing’s embrace, face slightly flushed. He said to Old Man Zhang, “Were you already sick of me?”
Old Man Zhang harrumphed, “If it wasn’t because you had nowhere to go and that you would die if left out on the streets, did you think that I would be willing to let you leech off of me?”
Xie He said solemnly, “After I recovered, I went to work. Aside from what I needed for food, I gave you all of my earnings.”
Old Man Zhang replied, “Consider it the rent fee.”
Lu Jianing could see that although the words didn’t sound nice, actually, the former was really concerned for the latter, while the latter was very grateful towards the former. Actually, Lu Jianing was also very grateful towards Old Man Zhang. After all, he had saved Xie He.
“I am very grateful that you saved him,” Lu Jianing said, “This is just a bit of my appreciation. Please accept it.”
Before coming, he had made preparations and brought with him a sum of cash. He had thought that, if it really was Xie He, then he would definitely have to express his gratitude. He didn’t think that he would really be using it. This was the sum of money that Lu Jianing had wanted to use the most ever. He was happy from the depths of his heart to use it.
Old Man Zhang, however, wasn’t happy. “He’s already paid me back for saving him. It couldn’t be that I should be paid back twice for saving someone once?”
Lu Jianing said, “This is not the same. You saved my lover. If I don’t express my gratitude, then I will have a guilty conscience.”
Old Man Zhang still wasn’t willing to accept it. Carrying the bag on his back, he entered his home.
Xie He sighed. He said to Lu Jianing, “Give it to me, ba.”
Lu Jianing complied and handed the bag over to him.
Xie He reached out and accepted the bag that contained an unknown amount of cash. Without saying a word, he directly carried it into the house. Old Man Zhang was raising his granddaughter all by himself. He needed money. Xie He placed it on the desk and said, “It seems like I’m quite valuable. Won’t it be a loss to not accept this? Even if you don’t want it for yourself, think of Lingling.”
Old Man Zhang looked at Xie He. He could see loneliness in the old man’s eyes. Actually, he was a bit reluctant to see Xie He leave…. However, from the moment he had saved this person, he had known that this kind of person could not stay with him. They were people from different worlds.
Xie He said softly, “I have to go. I want to know about my past. But I will come back to see you. Don’t miss me too much.”
Old Man Zhang, “Get out of here, who’s gonna miss you?”
Xie He laughed and then left.
Lu Jianing waited outside quietly. He said in a soft voice, “Are you ready to go now? If there’s still things you have to deal with, we can wait a bit. It’s fine.”
Xie He fixed his gaze onto his and suddenly asked, “Are you really my lover?”
Without any hesitation, Lu Jianing replied with, “Yes.”
Xie He smiled, looking a bit embarrassed. “I’m sorry that I forgot you. Can you tell me what my name is? I really want to know.”
Lu Jianing said, “Your name is Bai Mu.”
Xie He nodded, expression appreciative. His eyes were glittering. “Thank you for having found me.”
……………………………………
Lu Jianing took Xie He back to their city. However, he didn’t let Xie He return to his own home, nor did he tell Lin Ran and the others about him. Instead, he secretly buried this information and hid Xie He in his villa in the outskirts of town.
Because he knew that this was his only chance to start over again with Xie He.
If Xie He remembered the past, he would love Ye Jinzhou again. He would only reject Lu Jianing like he had before.
But now…Xie He, who was currently like a blank sheet of paper, would only belong to him.
Since there was no way to make up for their past regrets, then right now, he would let them disappear. They would not have any regrets between them anymore.
It was God’s deep love for him that allowed him to be the first to find Xie He.
When Xie He arrived at Lu Jianing’s luxurious and imposing villa, he smiled and said, “Is this your home?”
Lu Jianing smiled and replied in turn, “This is our home.”
Xie He looked at this unfamiliar place. Although Lu Jianing had treated him with the utmost care, this place didn’t feel familiar to him at all. It was probably because he had lost his memories, ba. Although he acted very calm, there was still some fear deep inside of him. Xie He was someone with no past or future…. Just who was he?
“Can you tell me about me?” Xie He asked.
“Of course,” Lu Jianing said.
Lu Jianing took Xie He in a natural manner and took him to sit on the sofa. There was deep love in his eyes. He said, “We were family friends. I’m older than you by one year. We’ve been classmates from elementary school to university. In high school, we secretly got together behind our parents’ backs. Later on, we continued on until now. I am your first love and you are mine. Xiao Mu…you have always been the person I’ve loved the most. You don’t know how upset I was when I found out that something had happened to you. Thank god…you’re alive.”
Xie He saw the love in Lu Jianing’s eyes. He wanted to lament but also felt moved. “That’s really…so beautiful it doesn’t seem real….”
Lu Jianing looked at him, appearing sad. “You don’t believe me?”
Xie He actually felt a bit hesitant. A love of more than ten years, a first love that lasted until they entered society as adults…it was really so beautiful it didn’t seem real. The person in front of him also seemed so perfect that he seemed like a dream…. But Lu Jianing didn’t seem like he was acting in the least. The emotions in Lu Jianing’s eyes were so sincere. Therefore, Xie He smiled and said, “No. I just feel very lucky to have a lover like you.”
Lu Jianing gazed into Xie He’s eyes and couldn’t suppress the passion in his heart. He suddenly pressed down on Xie He’s shoulders and kissed him!
Heaven only knew…how much he had yearned for this, yearned for this person to come back to him. Finally, it had happened….
Xie He wanted to dodge instinctively. But when he thought that this was his beloved, and that the other had suffered through such alarm because of him, he couldn’t bear to do anything that would upset the other. Therefore, he forced himself to cooperate, craning his neck up.
Probably because he had voluntarily cooperated, Lu Jianing’s actions became even more fierce. Lu Jianing pressed down against Xie He’s body, sucking out the sweetness from between his lips.
Xie He was kissed until he found it difficult to breathe. He felt Lu Jianing let go and then perceived a scorching hot kiss get planted on his neck. Those lips slowly inched lower…. He finally couldn’t stand it anymore and pressed a hand against Lu Jianing. His cheeks were flushed. “L…Let’s continue talking about the past, okay…?”
Lu Jianing paused and didn’t force Xie He. He let go of him obediently and said, “OK. Whatever you want to know, I’ll tell you.”
Since he already had this person, he could be patient for a bit longer.
Xie He sighed in relief and said, “I want to know why my family didn’t come looking for me? Also, what do I do? Why did something happen to me?”
Lu Jianing sighed. “Your father and mother passed away ten years ago. You have no other relatives. As for you…you’ve always worked at my company. Two months ago, you were returning from a business trip. Because you were driving while exhausted, you crashed and fell into the river.”
“So it’s like that, ah…” Xie He looked down. A long time later, he said softly, “Then right now, I only have you….”
“Don’t be afraid.” Lu Jianing held Xie He softly. “I will always be with you.”
My most beloved, you’ve finally returned to my side.
I will never leave you again.
【Ding, Lu Jianing’s Favourability Value +3. The current Favourability Value is 98.】
……………………………………
Lu Jianing took meticulous care of Xie He. Even if he had to go to work everyday, he wouldn’t forget to take out some time to send Xie He messages. He had also taken Xie He to all of the major hospitals to get checked out. However, the doctors all said that whether or not he regained his memories would be down to luck. Right now, there was no effective treatment plan.
Lu Jianing acted like this was a pity but secretly felt relieved. He looked at the gentle Xie He who stayed by his side and thought, it’s good like this….If he remembered his past, Xie He would definitely leave Lu Jianing.
In the beginning, Lu Jianing was a bit worried. Later on, when he saw that Xie He showed no signs of remembering, he slowly felt reassured. He continued to soften Xie He with a gentle offensive.
Xie He could feel that Lu Jianing truly loved him. Even though he didn’t have his memories, the love in Lu Jianing could not be faked. As they spent more time together, he didn’t feel so distant anymore. He would even occasionally act intimate with the other.
Moreover, after seeing so many photos of himself and Lu Jianing—from when they were young to after they had grown up— as well as the many letters they had written to each other and the gifts they had exchanged, he believed Lu Jianing even more, as none of it could be faked. He could see traces of his existence here with Lu Jianing.
【Xie He：Sigh.JPG】
【444：What’s wrong, Host dada?】
【Xie He：Nothing. I’m just lamenting over how Jianing is too gentle. If you don’t seize an opportunity, it will disappear in the blink of an eye. Smile.JPG】
【444：(⊙v⊙) Hm?】He felt like Lu Jianing seemed to really understand how to seize opportunities, ah…could this be because they didn’t have a sex life?
【Xie He：How’s ZhouZhou these days?】
【444：He went back to HQ for a bit. Right now, he’s come back. It seems that he plans on staying at your place and not leaving..】
【Xie He：Very good. It’s about time to stage a chance encounter. 🙂 】
For the last few days, Xie He had refrained from going out. He had Lu Jianing buy him a lot of books. He wanted to re-learn and get re-accustomed to his current life.
At night, when Lu Jianing came home, Xie He came over to help him take off his coat upon hearing the sound of the door opening. Lu Jianing pulled Xie He into his arms by the wrist and gave him a loving, deep kiss.
Xie He looked at him helplessly. Lu Jianing was really too clingy.
As they ate dinner, Xie He said hesitatingly, “I want to go back to work. What do you think?”
Lu Jianing smiled, “Do you think that I can’t afford to support you? Don’t force yourself. Getting better is the most important.”
Xie He looked a bit sad. He didn’t feel happy relying on Lu Jianing like this.
Lu Jianing blinked and then said, “Do you feel bored? If you feel bored, how about we go out for a bit tomorrow, OK?”
Xie He forced himself to smile. “OK.”
Lu Jianing didn’t say anything else. He lowered his head and continued to eat.
It wasn’t that he didn’t see the sadness in Xie He’s eyes. It was just that he wasn’t ready yet…. He as afraid that Xie He would realize that he was lying if he came into contact with too many familiar people, that he would know that they had broken up a long time ago and that his current lover was somebody else.
Lu Jianing didn’t know about the grudge between Ye Jinzhou and Xie He. Only Lin Ran and Xu Zhen knew about this. However, he knew that Ye Jinzhou hadn’t left. It was obvious that he wasn’t over Xie He. Therefore, he didn’t want to risk it.
After dinner, the two of them watched TV together. Lu Jianing suddenly hugged Xie He and said, “I really, really love you.”
Xie He laughed in spite of himself. “I know.”
Lu Jianing cast his gaze to the floor. After you fall in love with me again, I’ll tell you the truth, OK?
……………………………………
The next morning, there was a drizzle outside. Xie He wore a light grey windbreaker and Lu Jianing wore something similar. They looked like they were wearing couple clothes.
When Xie He saw this, he smiled. Lu Jianing was already so old but he still didn’t forget to be a little romantic when they were together.
Lu Jianing drove and took Xie He downtown. When they passed a shopping mall, Xie He suddenly asked, “Where are we?”
Lu Jianing glanced at him and said, “We’re at the XX commercial plaza.”
“Let’s walk around here,” Xie He turned his head and said with a smile, “It seems a bit familiar. Maybe I came here in the past.”
Lu Jianing’s heart thumped but he didn’t show any of it on his face. He said, “OK.”
He then drove into the parking lot of a shopping mall.
The two of them entered the shopping mall. Lu Jianing looked at Xie He nervously. “Did you remember anything?”
Xie He furrowed his brows and thought for a while. He then smiled, “No. I just feel like it’s a bit familiar.”
“Don’t force yourself. Think slowly,” Lu Jianing said in a soft voice and smiled while holding Xie He’s hand, “In any case, I’m here. Even if you can’t remember, it’s fine.”
“You’re right.” Xie He said, a small smile on his lips.
Lu Jianing raised his hand and glanced at his watch. “It’s noon. How about we have lunch and then go watch a movie?”
Xie He nodded, “I’ll follow whatever you have in mind.”
Lu Jianing took Xie He up to the ninth floor and searched for a restaurant. Halfway through their meal, Xie He got up and said, “Sorry, I need to use the washroom.”
Xie He stood up and left, heading outside.
【Xie He：Baby, where’s ZhouZhou?】
【444：He just came out from watching a movie on his own. He’s in the corridor of the eight floor. (⊙v⊙)】
【Xie He：OK, got it. 🙂 】
……………………………………
This was somewhere Xie He and Ye Jinzhou had come often in the past. But now, Ye Jinzhou was here alone…. Today, a movie was released. It was a film Xie He had invested in when he was still with Rongzhi Media. It wasn’t a big production but it was said that Xie He really liked it…. Ye Jinzhou thus wanted to come see it.
What he could only do now was to look for hints of Xie He from these little traces he left behind….
The movie wasn’t bad. It was just too bad that Xie He couldn’t see it.
Ye Jinzhou headed outside, following the crowd. Probably because he was a bit absentminded, he was bumped into. The other apologized at once, “Sorry.”
That voice was like a sudden clap of thunder in Ye Jinzhou’s ears.
He suddenly turned his head and saw that the person who had bumped into him had already walked away, as if he didn’t recognize him at all and they were just brushing past each other. All that was left was a familiar figure…. Ye Jinzhou broke out into a sudden sprint and chased after him. He grabbed hold of the other’s arm and said in a trembling voice, “Bai Mu?”
When Xie He heard this, he turned around, astonished. He looked at the man who looked evidently stirred up. Could this be someone he used to know? He asked, hesitatingly, “Sorry…but who are you?”
The author has something to say:
Lalala, congratulations to me for having all three major melodramatic tropes in this novel: going insane, mentally ill, and amnesia. 2333. \(≧▽≦)/
Every plot device I used has been guessed by you guys. (*/ω╲*)
Cough cough cough, those that say that the gong abuse isn’t enough, this is just the appetizer…. If the Favourability Value is full, how could we continue to abuse him? 2333
sere: honestly i guessed amnesia too… its not that hard….Xie He is 1) alive, 2) not returned, so why? Pretty much only amnesia.