Spying On
I stared at Wei Tan with a foolish expression.
He looked at me with a faint smile on his lip, but his eyes had darkened so that I could not read what was in his mind.
“Qingzhou?” I repeated.
“En.” Wei Tan answered. “Tan Xi made a surprise attack three days ago, FuQin has ordered the San Junto prepare for war, and within the next few days, we will begin the expedition to the North.”
I: “.....”
I had to admit that Wei Tan really has the ability to make people feel down in an instant. The tension and charm just disappeared like a passing wind.
Wei Tan let go of his hand, and apart from continuing to sit with me on the couch, he remained calm.
“How long will Fujun be gone?” I asked.
“How long it will take is not very important” Wei Tan said, “This battle is dangerous, Furen must have guessed this.”
I was shocked. I was aware of recent affairs. Tan Xi was claimed to have millions of army in the north, might makes right. That day, Gongyang Gui also said that there was a shortage of money and food in the court, and now Wei Jue is actually about to attack The Tan?
"I remember that The Fu Family’s ancestral land is in Huainan.” Wei Tan said suddenly.
“En?” The topic jumped too fast. I froze for a moment, and nodded.
Wei Tan looked at me and said “Furen has not been back for so many years. I've talked with Fuqin and Muqin regarding this matter, and Furen can return to your hometown to ji sao."
I did not understand and said "Ji sao?"
Wei Tan's lips still had a trace of playfulness, but his voice was steady. "Furen also knows that our marriage was a matter of expediency. In the northeast corner of my side room, there are ten jinFuren leaves, you can take it with you."
I was dumbfounded.
These words, uttered one by one like thunderclaps, stunned me so much that I felt dizzy, and I almost doubted whether I had heard them correctly.
A strange silence fell upon us.
"Fujun's intention….," I stared at Wei Tan's face, my heart pounding. "you want a divorce?"
"I'm not trying to divorce you," Wei Tan spoke slowly. "If Furen wishes to stay, Furen can remain as a member of the Wei family. If Furen find it dull to stay, Furen may also leave. It is entirely up to Furen's own wishes."
I listened in silence for a long time.
The feeling in my heart was strange, like a person who had fled and was wandering around, feeling sad halfway through the journey, and suddenly someone drove a horse-drawn carriage to welcome them, carrying a pot of wine and a jug of water, and saying to them, "Eat and sleep, and in the future, do whatever you love to do."
"Is this Cheng XiangPrime Minister; Wei Jue's intention?" I asked.
"No," Wei Tan replied in a plain tone. "I do not force anyone to do anything against their will."
*******
In the end, Wei Tan did not stay the night. He said that Wei Jue had a meeting to attend to in the middle of the night, so he put on his coat and left.
I, on the other hand, did not sleep all night, tossing and turning on the bed.
In my half-awake state, I didn't know how long had passed when I heard the low whispers of the servants in the courtyard. I opened my eyes and saw that the white silk curtains on the window were already letting in some dawn light.
On the couch, only my clothes were hanging on the hanger, and it was empty next to it. I stared at it, and Wei Tan's words from last night kept echoing in my mind.
He said I could leave, and I could even take his money with me. I could leave the Wei family and go wherever I wanted…
To be honest, my heart is not really in this place. I have never considered this place as my home.
There are many, many places I want to go, but the place I most yearn for is the overseas land that I heard about from the Fangshi who sat beside my father when I was young. He said that if you keep going east, you will see the sea, and if you ride on a raft on the sea, you will encounter countless islands. Above there are immortals, monsters, and also people of various cultures. Flowers bloom all year round, and the treasure light is like rosy clouds.
Ruochan once laughed at me and said that these stories were all made up by Fangshi to deceive people. She said it's better to believe that one can become an immortal by chopping firewood for a lifetime on Mount Zhongnan.
This comment had a great impact on me, but later, one of my father's old subordinates who had been sent overseas by the late Emperor on a diplomatic mission, returned and told me that it was true that one would see the sea if they traveled east and that there were indeed islands. However, the talk of immortals and precious treasures was just empty words, and the people on the islands were mostly uncivilized natives.
"But the land and sea were truly beautiful." A contented smile appeared on his weathered face. "In the future, Xiao Nüjun should go and see it for yourself. The blue sea and sky are boundless, and riding the waves on a boat is just as carefree as swimming fish!"
Being as carefree as fish….Is there still a place as carefree as swimming fish in this chaotic world?
I turned over and let out a soft sigh.
When Ah Yuan came in, I already put my clothes on.
"Furen," she asked yawning, "I heard that Da GongZi returned to the barracks last night?"
"En." I responded as I leaned over the wash basin to wash my face.
After I wiped my face clean, Ah Yuan walked up to me and whispered, "Furen, my father just sent a letter." With that, she handed me a small, folded piece of paper.
I perked up and gestured for her to close the door. I walked over to the window and examined the paper closely.
In the letter, Li Shang wrote that the Lu Mansion had paid 6000 yuan (taels of silver) for the meat last night, and after deducting the expenses of purchasing, slaughtering, and transporting the livestock, the profit is 2,600 yuan.
As I looked at the numbers, my heart soared with joy and all the messy things from last night vanished into thin air. After some thought, I immediately picked up a pen and wrote back to Li Shang. I told him that Wei Jue would be heading north to attack Tan Xi and would need a large supply of high-quality meat. Additionally, injuries and illness among soldiers are common, so if Li Shang had any spare time, he could go to the nearby villages to see if there were any medicinal herbs to collect.
**********
After that day, I didn't see Wei Tan again for three consecutive days.
During that period, his attendants came back and said that they needed to prepare clothing for the upcoming expedition. I personally packed for him and chose two or three pieces of thick clothing for the autumn season, in addition to his summer clothes.
Compared to the calm in Wei Residense, there were strong rumors spreading outside. Ah Yuan told me that the grain in the market had been limited tightly, but fortunately, the medicinal herbs were produced in rural areas, and Li Shang had collected many of them.
There is one more thing. The bǐqiūní from the Danxia Sì (Danxia Temple) in the suburban area have sent a note, saying that they will hold a FaHui in two days and invited Guo Furen to attend.
Danxia Temple is the place where Guo Furen usually worships, but now that Wei Jue is going to war, Guo Furen is busy every day and has no time to participate in any FaHui. As a result, the task of attending the Fahui fell on me again.
Actually, I already knew about this matter. It was because Ruochan had previously asked Ah Yuan to pass on a message to me, saying that on the day of the FaHui, she would be waiting for me at Danxia Temple.
"Ruochan Nüjun said that she has a good show for Furen." Ah Yuan said.
When I heard this, my forehead twitched.
This Fahui was probably arranged by Ruochan, and she counted on Guo Furen not attending. Ruochan is always like this, she likes to take a roundabout way in everything and is happiest when others are surprised. This is how she used to play games when she was a little girl, and it was the same at Qionghua Temple last time too. This time, I also have a premonition that it won't be a good show.
When I returned from Qionghua Temple, I understood that perhaps Ruochan would still be close to me as she had in the past, but something had changed between us.
Perhaps I am just a naturally curious person. If Ruochan is Jiang Taigong, then I am the fish that always bites the hook. So on the day of the religious ceremony, I bathed and dressed up early in the morning, and rode a carriage out of the city.
"I knew you would come." Inside the Danxia Temple, Ruochan was still wearing a plain white garment and had a clear complexion. When she saw me, she had a smile of accomplishment on her face.
I didn't offer much courtesy either and said, "Not only did you bribe the Taoist temple, but you also won over the Buddhist temple?"
Ruochan smiled and said, "It's not considered bribery. I just make more offerings to the gods than others."
I couldn't match her quick wit, so I looked around and said, "Didn't you say there was a good show here?"
"A good show?" Ruochan looked innocent and asked, "What good show?"
I stared in surprise.
Ruochan covered her sleeve and laughed, "ChengXiang is about to launch a northern expedition, and people everywhere are fearful. What's wrong with wanting to see you?" After speaking, she took my hand and said softly, "Last time at the Qionghua Temple, we didn't have a chance to appreciate the flowers and talk. There are fragrant flowers in the Danxia Temple, would you like to walk with me?"
I looked at her, half-believing, half-doubting.
Danxia Temple is located on the shore of a large lake called Yongchi. On a day without auspicious significance, the vast temple grounds were only occupied by Ruochan and me. The sky was cloudy and the sunlight was not strong. We strolled through the shade of the trees, and the fragrance of the blooming flowers filled our lungs. The forest of flower trees extended all the way to the water's edge. The vast lake was gentle and a small pavilion was built among the rocks and trees, offering a view of the lake.
"On that day, did you make any progress with Da GongZi?" Ruochan and I sat down in the pavilion, and she asked me.
I knew she would mention those things. My face grew hot and I said, "The military is preparing for war, and Da GongZi did not return home to spend the night."
"Oh?" Ruochan looked at me, raised an eyebrow, with her gaze full of inquiry.
Changing the subject, I said, "With the war about to start, what are your plans? Are you going to leave Yongzhou?"
"Leave?" Ruochan said, "Why would I leave?"
I said, "Of course it's to avoid chaos. The outcome of wars is unpredictable. Aren't you afraid of offending the court if Tan Xi invades Yongzhou [/modern_footnote]?"
Ruo Chan smiled ambiguously and said, "Even the ladies of the Wei clan have such concerns? Do you want to leave?"
I ignored her joke and said, "I'm asking you."
I took the jasmine flower from her hand, feeling a bit awkward.
Ruochan still maintained a calm and composed demeanor. She reached out and plucked two jasmine flowers from the flower bushes below the railings. She handed me one of the flowers while twirling the other between her fingers.
"Where to go," she said lightly, "the world is in great chaos, and there's no difference in going anywhere. At most, when things get tough, we can retreat to the countryside, but we can't leave Yongzhou. No matter who becomes the lord, we still have to entertain, right?"
That's a practical point, I thought about it and nodded my head.
"Will Gongyang GongZi accompany you?" I asked.
There was a hint of stiffness in Ruochan's smile, and she didn't answer. But suddenly, she looked down towards the lake and curved her lips, saying in a low voice, "Ah Jin, didn't you ask me where the good show was? It's here now."
I followed her gaze and looked over.
The trees obscured our view, but we could see a waterside pavilion. The water shimmered like silver, and a woman wearing a mì lí(羃离) hat walked gracefully towards us. She arrived at the pavilion and looked around, but we were hidden in a secluded and remote location, and the woman didn't notice us.
I looked at Ruochan in surprise, but she still smiled calmly and looked at the woman with a composed expression.
Not long after, I heard a series of fragmented sounds, as if a horse's hooves were stepping on sand and stones. The lake breeze blew gently, and suddenly a man appeared in our view. He paused for a moment upon seeing the woman, and then walked towards the waterside pavilion after a short while.
The two individuals obviously knew each other, and I saw them talking with faint rustling sounds carried by the wind. Not long after, the man turned around, seeming to leave, but then the woman suddenly stepped forward and hugged the man by the waist.
Her soft call came clearly: "...Meng Jing!"
The sound of the wind by my ears seemed to disappear in an instant.
I saw the woman bury her head in the man's back and say something.
The man didn't turn around but held the woman's hands for a while, before he let them go.
I am familiar with that low-pitched voice, even if we are far apart, I won't mistake it.
After he finished speaking, he left.
The woman stood alone on the water pavilion for a while, and then slowly walked away.
"They have left." A voice entered my ears. I came back to my senses, and saw that Ruochan was staring at me.
I didn't say anything, but the two figures still kept spinning in my mind.
"Was that The Empress?" My heart was in a bit of chaos, I regained my composure and asked.
Ruo Chan smiled and didn't deny it.
"Did you arrange this?" I blurted out, realising something.
Ruochan remained calm, playing with the flowers in her hands as she lowered her gaze, then suddenly pointed to the ground and said, 'Your flower fell.'"
I looked down and indeed, the jasmine I was holding had fallen on the ground at some point. I had lost my interest in admiring flowers and only focused on Ruochan. "Why?"
"I have no reason not to," Ruochan said. "You know how Xu Hou and I met. She wanted to see Da GongZi, but was hindered by the constraints of the palace. So she asked me for help. When I first arrived at the NingXiang Pavillion, Xu Guozhang had done me a favor, so now I am returning the favor. As for you, you have some connections, so I take you to see it too. " With a sly smile, she finished speaking.
She said it lightly, but as I looked at Ruochan's gentle face, my heart grew colder and colder.
"Now that you've seen it, what do you think?" I remained expressionless.
"This question should be asked of you," Ruochan said slowly. "Ah Jin, do you think Da GongZi, who always stays in the military camp, truly has the country's best interests in his heart?"
"Don't worry about it." I frowned.
"Oh, are you angry?" Ruochan's gaze sharpened as she sneered, "I won't let you be a fool who's deceived by others, and yet I'm the one who's wrong?"
"No, Ruochan," I shook my head, "Me and him are not what you think."
"What do you mean?"
I opened my mouth but felt at a loss for words, and reluctantly said, "I can't explain it either."
Ruochan's expression was full of suspicion.
"Ah Jin," she said, "You still can't forget about Jiyuan GongZi, can you?"
My heart trembled.
"How could it be," I curved my lips, laughing stiffly.
Ruochan looked at me for a moment, sighed, and then fell silent.