Anxious Heart
In the Wei residence, it has returned to days filled only with women.
Guo Furen either goes to the Buddhist hall daily for prayers or has Xu Ji bring Wei Zhi to her room, personally taking care of him.
Liang Hui still shows no kindness towards this mother and son. Every day, when she serves in front of Guo Furen, she doesn't even raise her eyebrows when she sees them.
However, Xu Ji is utterly composed. She never sits in front of Guo Furen and Liang Hui. She refills empty teacups, adjusts cushions for those who seem uncomfortable without waiting for them to ask; she takes the initiative. Her attentiveness surpasses that of a maidservant. Whatever Guo Furen says, she responds obediently, always wearing a mix of seven parts smile and three parts smile on her face, striking the perfect balance of humility.
In contrast, Liang Hui doesn't speak much and rarely participates in the lively conversations among the women. Sometimes, when Guo Furen is happily holding Wei Zhi, Liang Hui would mention feeling tired, make her courtesy, and leave.
"Gongzhu is truly strong-willed. Guo Furen's expression turned sour, but Gongzhu paid no attention to it," Zhou Shi and others said in private.
"She is a princess," Zhu Shi said. "Even if Guo Furen is her mother-in-law, she used to bow in front of her when they met before."
"But now she's Er Gongzi's wife, yet she carries herself with such an air, and we can't even speak freely," Mao Shi, who is quite outspoken, told me. "Zhangsao and Gongzhu have known each other since childhood. Why not try to advise her?"
I smiled and replied, "I'm not very familiar with the Princess. When she's around me, there isn't much to talk about."
"Do you not remember how long it took for Gongzhu's Jiumu to persuade her last time?" Zhu Shi glanced at me, scolding Mao Shi with her eyes. "Besides, it's best for us to stay out of Guo Furen's affairs."
The point was well taken, and everyone tacitly understood, shifting the conversation to another topic.
In fact, Liáng Huì isn't distant with me. We've known each other for a long time, and being sisters-in-law (sì dì), she often comes to my courtyard for visits. She cleverly avoids discussing the Palace or the late Empress Dowager, focusing on reminiscing about the old days in Chang'an. We have many mutual acquaintances, and she even knows about Ruochan.
"I heard that Chen Nǚjun is quite famous in the entertainment circles these days," Liáng Huì said in a low voice.
Though the words were delicately phrased, I naturally understood their meaning.
"Qie is not aware of such matters," I replied.
"In those days, Chen Nǚjun was truly outstanding during Chen Gong was here," Liáng Huì sighed. "If I were Chen Nǚjun, I'd rather die than endure such humiliation."
Hearing those words, I observed Liáng Huì more closely, noticing a tinge of self-reproach on her face.
"Everyone experiences periods of fortune and misfortune. If One wants to survive, One must adapt," I looked at her and said with warmth.
I didn't know how much of that Liáng Huì took in. At that moment, there was a hint of surprise in her eyes, followed by a bitter smile, as she changed the subject.
*****
The affairs of the women in the household seemed trivial in my eyes; what truly required my attention was the matters related to business.
By the end of Seventh Month, the medicinal supplies at Yánnián Hall were nearly depleted. I took advantage of a trip to the temple to secretly meet with Lǐ Shàng. Though he didn't want to give up on Yánnián Hall, the current situation was clear: a standoff between the North and the South, and the government had tightened control over the trade routes. Despite being a legitimate business, the risks of traveling back and forth were unpredictable.
Lǐ Shàng and I discussed the situation, and we decided to transfer the remaining inventory to another herbal shop and temporarily close down Yánnián Hall. We would keep the signboard and storefront, considering that our reputation was already well-established. It was better to close temporarily and wait for the right moment to resume operations, rather than facing disgruntled customers due to shortages.
Not long after we had settled on this plan, there was a major incident involving Gōngyáng Guì.
In the past six months, although Yánnián Hall had not restocked, Gōngyáng Guì's delivery business hadn't stopped. His friends were originally former river pirates, seasoned individuals who had seen blood on the edge of their blades for many years. The standoff between Wèi Jué and Wú and Liáng was nothing in their eyes.
Gōngyáng Guì was also quite audacious, taking on a few assignments within Yōngdū. Almost every month, he embarked on a journey. The initial trips went smoothly, but this month, their group encountered soldiers from Wú Kūn's side while traveling by water. The soldiers were well-prepared, and even though the brave men from Gōngyáng Guì's group fought hard, they were outnumbered. In the end, Mǎ Kuí, who was leading them, was captured by the soldiers while sacrificing himself to allow the remaining brothers to escape.
News of this incident spread, and Gōngyáng Guì was very worried. He valued loyalty and immediately set out to rescue Mǎ Kuí at Huáiyáng. When Ruòchán heard the news and rushed to stop him, a heated argument ensued between the two. However, Gōngyáng Guì remained determined to go, and after a heated dispute, he eventually set off on his journey.
"Furen, Mǎ Kuí is a true man. I heard it took seventeen stabs before they finally subdued him," Àh Yuán said to me with a face full of admiration.
I couldn't help but frown. Although Gōngyáng Guì's actions were driven by friendship, it seemed impulsive to me. Setting aside the uncertainty of his journey to Huáiyáng, I wondered how he planned to carry out the rescue once he arrived there. Almost simultaneously, my thoughts turned to Péi Qián. Gōngyáng Guì had known him for a long time too. Could he be counting on Péi Qián to act as an intermediary?
Just as I was pondering this matter, Ruòchán sent a message, saying she was at the Dānxiá Temple and asked me to come without fail.
From her words, it's evident how anxious she is. I agreed to her request and immediately left the house, using the excuse of going to the temple for worship.
When I arrived in the backyard of the Dānxiá Temple, Ruòchán wasn't leisurely preparing tea as she used to. A hat was discarded on the stone platform, indicating the haste with which she had arrived at this place.
"Did Āh Jǐn hear about Zhòng Píng's matter?" She approached me immediately and asked as soon as she saw me.
"I've heard," I replied. "Gōngyáng Gōngzǐ has already set off."
Ruòchán nodded, and after a while, she seemed to calm her emotions. She took a deep breath, then slowly exhaled.
"Don't be in a hurry," I said. "Once Gōngyáng Gōngzǐ reaches Huáiyáng, how does he plan to carry out the rescue?"
"What else can he do?" Ruòchán forced a hint of a smile, looking at me. "He's going to Jìyuān Gōngzǐ."
Is exactly as I thought it would be.
I pondered and asked, "Is it feasible?"
Ruòchán shook her head, saying, "I don't know. Zhòng Píng has to go and give it a try."
"What if it doesn't work?" I asked.
Ruòchán's gaze remained steady, and for a while, a hint of redness appeared in her eyes.
"Zhòng Píng took a sword and armor with him," she whispered softly.
I didn't say anything. The implication of her words was clear: if Gōngyáng Guì couldn't save him through diplomatic means, he was prepared to use force to rescue Mǎ Kuí.
"Does Gōngyáng Gōngzǐ's family know about this?" I paused and looked at Ruòchán. "I've heard that there are now many checkpoints on the way to Huáiyáng."
Ruòchán's eyes flickered. "Checkpoints?"
I nodded, "Exactly."
The two of us fell silent. Ruòchán was a smart person; she didn't need me to spell it out. She had already understood my implication.
"As for the situation in Huáiyáng, we can write a letter to inform Péi Qián. Péi Qián and Gōngyáng Gōngzǐ have an old relationship, and if he can help, there's no need for Gōngyáng Gōngzǐ to go there personally. If he can't help…"
"If he can't help, then Zhòng Píng definitely shouldn't go," Ruòchán continued, her voice growing somewhat composed.
I added, "However, with the current North-South standoff, it may be difficult to find a reliable messenger to deliver the letter."
"No need to worry about that. I still know some people in Yōngdū," Ruòchán said, looking at me with bright, sparkling eyes. She furrowed her brows, contemplating for a moment, pacing back and forth in the courtyard, her ten fingers tightly clenched, just like she used to when plotting something exciting.
"Āh Chéng!" she suddenly shouted towards the courtyard.
Soon, a servant walked in and greeted us.
"Prepare the carriage. I need to leave the mountain immediately," Ruòchán said.
The servant acknowledged her request, and Ruòchán swiftly put on the discarded hat from the stone platform. As she was about to leave, she turned to look at me.
"Āh Jǐn..." She held my hand, her tone slightly unsteady, and whispered, "Since I've been with him, I've never felt this anxious before!"
Her fingers felt clammy and unusually cold. I looked at Ruòchán's face behind the veil and remembered the moment we reunited, her seemingly carefree demeanor at that time, as if she didn't care about anything.
Someone with such a strong and resolute mind, reaching this point, is probably acting out of genuine feelings.
Something seemed to stir within my heart, and suddenly, the silhouette from that day beneath the city wall appeared in my mind again.
I opened my mouth, intending to say something, but after a moment, I simply smiled faintly and said, "Don't delay any longer, go."
Ruò Chán nodded, released my hand, and turned to leave.
Her figure disappeared around the courtyard gate, and I remained in the same spot, pondering the fleeting emotions I had just experienced.
The wind carried the unique scent of summer, dry yet warm. In the distance, faint sounds of bells could be heard, and the chanting of the bǐqiūnís resonated, slow and serene, like an eternal chant stretching through the ages.
Why dwell on these thoughts when I can't even see him? It's self-deprecating, I thought to myself.
I glanced at the sky, let out a sigh, and started walking towards the courtyard gate.
Just as I returned to the residence and was about to enter the main hall, I suddenly saw Wèi Ān running towards me.
"Zhangsao!" His usually contemplative face was rare with a smile, and his eyes were gleaming. "Fuqin sent a letter, allowing me to join him at the military camp!"